The curious case of Merlin and Morgana
by kessilover
Summary: Merlin and morgana wake up after the dreadful end of the war, to unfamiliar life. In which , they are helping Arthur rule Albion , not to mention the fact that they are married and expecting their first child. How will they cope with this life? Obviously mergana.
1. Chapter 1

**_ A/N_**: I know nobody is interested in reading this ,so. Crazyjen edited this chapter. So thank you.

You can find me in tumblr under "merganafanfics"

_**Obligatory disclaimer**_:Merlin and all associated creative properties belong to BBC. I don't claim any said property as my own, and I make no monetary profit from this fan-made story. All creative property not associated with said channel belong to me, and their use is limited to my express permission. Thank you.

* * *

**_CHAPTER 1: PROLOGUE_**

* * *

The first thing Merlin's tired mind registered once he was fully awake, from what felt like a deep slumber, was that he was laying on a soft mattress.

_'Strange_.' He thought, for he wasn't used to such things, yet it was oddly comfortable and recognizable. He kept his eyes closed, letting himself be absorbed by the peacefulness he was feeling inside, joined by the sunrays on his face; he hoped he would never have to get up. Merlin felt for the first time in a long time, surprisingly well-rested.

A groan reached his ears and he froze and held his breath.

'_Whoa! What was that?'_ He wondered.

Someone rolled over in the bed beside him, and he felt the arm around his chest - which he hadn't realized was there - tighten its hold slightly. Merlin shivered; his mind stopped functioning for a split second. He raised his eyebrows, his eyes remaining shut.

The bed shifted again and he blinked twice, trying not to make any sudden movements. He started to freak out. Someone was next to him, but who? Since he could feel smooth skin, he came to the conclusion that he was bare-chested.

"Not good, not good," he repeated, over and over again, until he could no longer pronounce the words correctly.

Eventually, his eyes fluttered open, the bright light from the sun hit them and he shielded them with his arm. Moments later, once his eyes grew accustomed to the daylight, he pulled his arm away. The first thing his eyes noticed was the ceiling. He furrowed his brow as he took in the sight above of him.

Somehow, it looked awfully familiar to him. It was not the ceiling from his room in Gaius's house that he had woken up to countless of times. Even though it was different, it gave him an eerie feeling of recognition. He was in one of castle's room. Which one? He had no clue. Another thing to add to the odd list, he noted.

What had he done last night that led him here? There was the possibility that maybe he'd gone to the tavern last night, perhaps Gwaine pressed him to, which could explain the memory lost.

'_Wait until I put my hands on you, Gwaine,'_ He threatened. '_You'll pay for this_.'

But after the tavern, did he…? He didn't have the heart to finish that thought. Swallowing the lump that formed in his throat, he growled mentally. Now how would he remedy this? His mind screamed at him for answers.

He took a deep breath in, an attempt to calm himself. His hand reached down the sheets, checking his nether half. Once his fingertips felt the fabric of his trousers, he sighed in relief. He made sure to do so as quietly as possible.

So perhaps nothing happened, he secretly hoped. Perhaps he'd been too drunk and he had offered to walk this woman back to her chamber, and on accident, ended up spending the night. That was more likely to happen. He was quite settled for that poor explanation.

What should he do next? He wondered. Should he leave or wait until the woman woke up?

Still unable to make a decision, Merlin tried to remember if Arthur had given him any extra things to do. But nothing came to him.

Strangely enough, he couldn't remember Gwaine asking for his company. Yesterday he was… everything was a blur, vague.

Yesterday, he had… he couldn't remember. He closed his eyes, trying to focus harder. No, no... He knew where he had been … he...he tried to think of the events of the previous day, anything. But they were hard to summon, everything seemed so far away; so foreign to him.

Why couldn't he remember last night? A thought clicked in his mind, as he came to realize something.

What _was_ the last thing he remembered? Last thing he did, last thing he said. What happened to him? Arthur. Something about Arthur, Morgana, and Mordred; something bad had happened, he could sense it. He must find him, he needed...

Another groan, it abruptly stopped his train of thought, and brought him back to reality. He sighed and tried to focus on the matter in hand.

Tremblingly, he raised his hand, in an attempt to inspect the one upon his chest. It was soft and small in his larger hand. He looked down and absentmindedly, he started to caress the pale skin. Touching the fingers gently, his hand started to move up, following the smooth skin until the arm shivered under his touch.

He pulled his hand fast, as if the skin burned. The feminine hand was still resting on his chest; it was all so strange, and yet, very right. Everything felt as if this was where he was supposed to be.

He shook that thought away and inhaled. Glancing down once again, his eyes started to move from the fingertips of said hand, to her forearm. His heartbeats sped up, with every part of the pale skin his eyes landed on, he gulped. His eyes came to their final destination, he was sure that the only thing that kept him from seeing this mysterious woman's face, was turning his head few degrees to the left. He gathered what courage he possessed, and turned his head and body to the side.

Nothing he had encountered before in his entire life could prepare him for that moment, and the sight his eyes beheld.

His eyes widened and his lips parted, suddenly he felt paralyzed. He closed his eyes briefly, opening them very slowly, as if the person before him were a mirage. Still unable to fully grasp what he was seeing, Merlin leaned closer to her face, inspecting her features, and staring at her peaceful face.

"Morgana…"he whispered, his voice sounding distant and foreign.

He sat up straight, forgetting the fact that he just woke up with her next him. Morgana rested on her side, Merlin watched her chest rise and fall rhythmically.

He looked around him and his head spinning, '_This is impossible_.' He suspected that either, he was hallucinating and that he was still under the influence of the mead, or he might have shagged the king's beloved ward. He wished wholeheartedly it would be the former.

All of the sudden, his eyes widened as everything came into focus and his memories came back to him, the war, Arthur, Morgana. He remembered everything: how he failed, how all was lost. He remembered Arthur dying in his arms, he had messed up his destiny; Gwaine was also dead. Everything he existed for was dead, gone because of her.

And yet here she was, alive. He doubted himself, thinking that his mind was playing tricks on him. He needed to make sure. His hand touched her cheek, something was different about her. Of course, everything was different when it came to Morgana, even the way he saw her now. The hatred and bitterness that usually radiated from her, the darkness in her heart that blackened her soul, was gone. Altered, replaced by...

_She killed Arthur_; he heard a voice inside his head remind him of the reality that for a few seconds he had forgotten.

"I guess I have to stop you, all over again."

His state of astonishment and complete bewilderment didn't last long. Soon shock and surprise turned into anger and despair.

His voice apparently wasn't as quiet as he imagined, for he watched as Morgana's eyelashes started to flutter, indicating she was stirring up. He waited silently, his eyes hard and determined. Her eyelids fluttered open and she squinted. Her eyes seemed disoriented for a second, she groaned again.

"Where am…" She trailed off, her eyes locking with his.

Her reaction, he thought, was way worse than his. Because soon after she opened her eyes and saw his face, her lips parted releasing a deafening, high-pitched scream that caused him to jump out of the bed. She followed suit.

At least, they agreed on something, they despised each other and knew the logical thing to do was to distance themselves.

Merlin covered his ear, "Stop." He ordered, screaming as loud and she. His guard was probably already up, he imagined hers was too now. So many attack-spells flashed through his mind as he prepared for the worst.

Surprisingly, she listened to him and ceased to scream. He was so focused on her face, studying her, waiting for her to strike, but that didn't happened.

Instead, he regarded her as she furrowed her brow. Hesitant, her eyes looked down and his followed.

That was when he got the second- well third shock of the day.

He couldn't even begin to believe the sight before him. She raised both her hands, they were shaking and touched her stomach, or her very huge stomach if he was to be honest.

Her head shot up to him. Her eyes were narrowed, her cheeks red and he couldn't tell for sure if she was angry or astonished.

"What have you done, Emrys?" She barked. Her voice was dripping with venom. Definitely angry, he thought.

He never got a chance to reply, everything that happened from that moment was pretty much a blur for him. Morgana's eyes turned gold, and he felt his body hover over the ground, before he was thrown back violently, his head hitting the wall with a crack.

The last thing he saw before he was absorbed by the darkness the blow caused, was Morgana's lips curving up as she smirked.

_ The nerve of that woman._

* * *

Merlin's body hit the hard floor and she smiled, proud of herself. The smile didn't last, and faded away as she got an eerily feeling in her stomach. Her eyes moved downward, she inhaled.

She tried to get rid of whatever it was clutching her abdomen, all in vain. Breathing heavily she glanced around her. She was back in her old chamber, she was in Camelot.

How did Merlin manage to bring her back? That was a question for another time. She considered her priorities; the main one was to leave that godforsaken place before she got captured.

She felt her belly move, something was inside of her. Her eyes widened and she lifted her nightdress up to her waist. With one hand holding the fabric up, the other started to poke at her belly, trying to figure out what had happened to her. All her hands could feel though was her tight skin from wrapped around her protruding belly. A thought crossed mind; she might have the slightest idea of what could be occurring to her, that could explain completely this bizarre circumstance, yet she knew for certain that it wasn't a possibility and ended up brushing it away, for now at least.

She gasped clasping a hand over her mouth to silence her squeak and her knees grew weaker. She felt like she was going to fall over. She sought something to help keep her on her feet, and found the table. She pressed a hand on her chest; her heart was beating so fast that she feared it might burst through her chest.

With every moment that passed, she grew more desperate than the moment before. She whimpered, feeling defeat and utterly overwhelmed by the whole uncomfortable situation. She went as fast she her feet could carry her and stood before the full length mirror.

Her eyes widened again, her head starting to spin. Tears willed up in her eyes, hands shaking and sweating, she checked her form. She turned to the both sides, searching, looking for something, anything that might explain why she appeared to be…

A shiver ran down her spine as the stopped herself from continuing that thought. Her hands dropped to her sides in exhaustion, shoulders slumping.

She sobbed and moved away from the mirror, uttering "No," while shaking her head in denial.

She knew for a fact what she was seeing in that reflection. She could deny it all she wanted but it wouldn't change what she already realized. She was clearly and unquestionably, without a drop of potential doubt - she, the lady Morgana, highest priestess of the Old Religion, was with child.

She glanced back to Merlin, still on the floor unconscious; her vision hazy, her eyes were clouded over with tears. She wiped away her tears, sniffling.

She didn't have much time to determine what spell or curse Emrys had cast on her. She glanced to the door, hearing an uproar joined by fast approaching footsteps; the knights of Camelot were closing in on her. She wouldn't let them capture her, she wouldn't grant Emrys the pleasure of seeing her apprehended.

Merlin must have done something; she wasn't supposed to be in here. No she was supposed to be… She swallowed. Looking back at Merlin, she knew she should be dead, right? He had driven that sword through her with no remorse and no regret. Unless he'd been lying about the dragon's breath, thus the sword wouldn't have harmed her.

Many ideas, thoughts and possibilities were running through her mind, and she felt lightheaded. She clutched the edge of the table with both hands, and heard the door burst open. Dark figures stormed inside, toward her. Her efforts to focus were fading quickly, as her arms began to give out. She prepared a spell in her mind, waiting for the attack.

This time her legs gave up on her, and she felt her body falling backwards, panting. She waited for the impact, having nothing to do to prevent it. Nevertheless, her body never touched the ground or even came closer to it as a pair of strong arms wrapped around her waist and caught her midair.

"I have you, Morgana. You're alright." She would recognize that voice anywhere; regardless, she lifted her head up to make sure.

"Arthur? How?" She murmured, before she joined Merlin in the land of unconsciousness.

* * *

_**Shall I continue it ? Blame my sister for the length. I wanted to write more. **_


	2. Chapter 2

**_A/N_**: I know nobody is interested in reading this ,so. Crazejen edited this chapter. So thank you.

You can find me in tumblr under "merganafanfics"

_**Obligatory disclaimer**_:Merlin and all associated creative properties belong to BBC. I don't claim any said property as my own, and I make no monetary profit from this fan-made story. All creative property not associated with said channel belong to me, and their use is limited to my express permission. Thank you.

* * *

**_ CHAPTER 2 : NOT WHAT IT SEEMS._**

* * *

"Go get Gaius."

"What do you think happened this time?"

Faint voices reached Merlin's ears; he was unable to place the voices. The painful throbbing of his head prevented him from identifying them clearly.

He suppressed a groan of pain, as he lifted his hand to check the back of his head for any injuries caused by the impact. He found none. His back protested once he attempted to move off of the ground. The encounter with Morgana played before his eyes, making his heart skip a beat.

"Merlin, are you alright?" A voice he recognized very well, spoke next to him. He turned his head, following the sound, until Sir Leon came into his line of vision.

"Morgana…" He uttered with difficulty, head still aching. He had to warn him, the whole castle needed to know that Morgana was still alive.

"She…" He stopped speaking when Sir Leon nodded his head, as if acknowledging what Merlin wanted to say.

"You know?" Merlin inquired, scowling. '_So why is he still here, instead of arresting Morgana?'_

The knight crouched with an outstretched hand, offering it to Merlin.

"She fainted," Leon glanced back. Even though Merlin couldn't see anything, he guessed Leon was looking at Morgana.

"We sent for Gaius. He'll be here shortly, don't panic," Leon explained, trying to reassure a very concerned Merlin that everything was under control. But Merlin didn't hear any of it; he cleared his throat, reaching out to take the knight's hand.

"Gaius? Why would you sent for him?" Bewildered, Merlin raised his eyebrow, "Don't send for Gaius." The warlock yelled getting to his feet. He whimpered quietly as pain struck him, as he tried to remain standing. When he accomplished that he huffed, straightening his back, until the pain ebbed away.

"Bring all of the knights of Camelot!" Merlin exclaimed, shoving Sir Leon away, once he trusted his legs to carry him.

"The Queen is in danger." He finally said, but his revelation was met with a look of utter confusion that washed over the knight's face. He didn't have time for that; there was precious little time to spare, and none of it could be wasted trying to convince Leon, he was telling the truth.

Merlin's eyes darkened, he would put an end to Morgana's threats. He turned away from the knight, ready to storm out of the room, yet he found himself unable to.

"Did Morgana receive a vision? Is this what happened here?"

Another voice, filled with worry and anxiety, spoke from behind the knight of Camelot. Merlin raised his head to look over Leon's shoulder. The two men stared at each other; no words passed between them for a moment.

Arthur's face showed the shock of Merlin's words, whilst the warlock was stunned to see Arthur, who was supposed to be dead, standing in front of him, carrying an unconscious Morgana in his arms.

Merlin's breath caught in his throat and whatever he was going to say, didn't leave his parted, trembling lips.

The room fell into a heavy and complete silence.

"Merlin…"Arthur finally said, "What do you mean Gwen is in danger? Who's going to hurt her?"

Arthur placed Morgana gently back on the bed, brushing a stray strand of hair from her face, before turning his attention back to Merlin.

The king's utterance brought Merlin back to reality, and he shook the fog that clouded his mind away.

"How is it possible?" Merlin whispered, ignoring the question, and taking a few steps closer to Arthur. The latter looked toward the remainder of the knights present in the chamber.

"Check the perimeters. Sir Leon, take three knights with you and guard the queen."

The order was heard and obeyed, the room was clear of all the knights, leaving only Arthur, Merlin and Morgana in the room.

Merlin was oblivious to what was happening around him. He couldn't take his eyes off of Arthur. He bit his bottom lip, even though he stood just few feet away from him, he couldn't tell if Arthur was real or not. He squinted at him suspiciously, and reached out to touch Arthur's ears, hair, and chin. His hands fell to his sides. His heart ached; the memories of Arthur, struggling and gasping to take yet another breath filled his mind and tears welled up in his eyes.

Arthur, up until that moment, had remained silent; observing Merlin with a look mixed with annoyance and worry.

"Merlin, what are you doing?" The blond man asked, as Merlin raised his hands and cupped Arthur's face.

"Extraordinary..." Merlin whispered. He squeezed Arthur's cheeks hard, watching in amazement as they turned red.

"Ow! Merlin, have you lost your mind?" Arthur slapped Merlin's hands away.

Merlin sniffed, embarrassed. He wiped away the tears that stained his face, and took couple of deep breaths, trying to calm the intensive feelings that overwhelmed him. He proceeded to put both of his hands on each of Arthur's shoulder, staying like that for a short moment, before squealing in complete joy and happiness.

"You're alive!" Merlin eyes brightened up.

_Smack._

Arthur's hand hit Merlin in the back of his head.

"Ow!" Merlin whimpered, touching his head. "That place is still sore from the blow, careful." He said. Arthur repeated his action, smacking Merlin once again.

"What was that for?" Merlin demanded, though his voice was light and teasing. He moved backwards, distancing himself from the king, afraid of being hit again. But his demeanor was met with a piercing glare from Arthur, which caused the smile to leave Merlin's face.

"I will not ask you again. Who wants to hurt my wife?" Arthur demanded in a firm voice.

Merlin was taken aback by the sudden change of behavior, and responded by scowling. He looked at the sleeping form of Morgana, and simply said; "Morgana," as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, and it was — at least to him.

"What about her?" The other man asked, sounding irritated.

"Morgana wants to kill Gwen!" Merlin exclaimed, beginning to feel bewildered again. "She tried to kill you…"

"This is not the time for jokes, Merlin." Arthur hissed. "If someone seeks to harm Gwen, I need to…" He was cut off by Merlin saying; "But it's the truth. I'm not trying to be funny, I swear."

Arthur sighed, running a hand through his messy hair. He glanced out the window briefly, before he looked back at Merlin.

"Really? You swear to me that Morgana wants to hurt Gwen?" He said disbelievingly, daring Merlin to answer.

"Yes," Merlin insisted. Arthur rolled his eyes and snorted, "And why would you think that Merlin?"

"I don't think," Merlin shook his head.

"That's for sure," Arthur muttered.

Merlin glared, ignoring the interruption by adding, "I know for certain."

"Then tell me why?"

"Because…"Merlin trailed off, he looked at Morgana, "It's Morgana. That's what she wants, it's what she's been trying to do for the…"

Arthur laughed this time, Merlin furrowed his brow.

"Why are you laughing?" Then something occurred to him, Merlin's eyes widened. "She enchanted you. She must have done so, that's why you can't remember. Yes…I need…to…" He looked around, rubbing his brow.

"I'm not enchanted, Merlin." Arthur snickered, "My god, Merlin, as if you're not stupid enough, Morgana had to go and hit you hard in the head," Arthur mused. Merlin wasn't listening; he was still spinning around, trying to figure out what to do, while mumbling incoherent words.

"What are you doing, Merlin?" The man in question stopped, his head shot up, as he looked at Arthur.

"I'm trying to think of any enchantments or spells, Morgana might have used on you." He paused, inhaling, and then added, "I'm not stupid. I'm telling the truth."

"Maybe she put the enchantment on your body?" Merlin thought aloud, and marched toward Arthur. "Take off your clothes." Merlin said, yet it sounded more like an order.

"WHAT?" Eyes wide, Arthur shoved Merlin away when the warlock raised his hands, and attempted to grasp the hem of Arthur's shirt.

"Stop this nonsense at once, Merlin! I'm no longer amused."

"It's not…" Merlin was cut off by the sound of the door opening. Gaius came inside in a hurry; his bag was already in his hand as he rushed to the bed. Arthur took that chance to jump away from Merlin.

"Oh dear! What's happened?" The old man's question was met with silence. Merlin watched, astonished and perplexed, as a worried Gaius started to examine Morgana.

"What's the matter with you? Why are you helping her?"

'_Did Morgana enchant the whole castle? Is that why nobody seemed to see her for what she really is?_' He couldn't help but think that, since it was the way it appeared.

Gaius head shot up, he narrowed his eyes and looked questioningly at Arthur, "What's the matter with him?"

"Morgana threw him against the wall." Arthur explained, he walked passed Merlin and closer to the bed, watching with concern as Gaius checked Morgana.

"I think he's lost it," The king added and sat on the edge of the bed.

"Oh," The physician said, as if it was the most normal thing in the world, "not again." Gaius rolled his eyes and sighed. He opened his bag and added; "I'll take a look at him once I finish with Morgana. Sit down, Merlin."

Merlin was overwhelmed by everything that he'd seen and heard from the moment he opened his eyes.

"How is she?" He vaguely heard Arthur ask Gaius.

"Arthur," He heard Gaius say, "I need to see if she's bleeding…"

"You want me to leave?" Arthur inquired and Gaius nodded.

"Take Merlin with you."

And with that, the two men headed outside. Arthur had his hand on Merlin's back, leading him through the door, "She's going to be fine, don't worry. Gaius will make sure of it." Merlin merely nodded absently.

Where was he? How come Arthur was alive? It was impossible, he watched him die. He had said goodbye to him, and had seen the last glimpse of the fallen king.

'_Where am I?'_ He wondered again, '_Maybe I'm offered another chance.'_ His eyes widened, letting his mind toy with that idea, he smiled despite himself. Still, that didn't explain why no one but him… he furrowed his brow, recalling the incident with Morgana. She was just as shocked as he had been when they'd seen each other. Perhaps, she too had no idea what was going on. He wasn't sure of anything yet; but one thing was for sure, only he and Morgana were aware of the changes around them. The men stood silent for few minutes, both occupied with their own thoughts.

"Merlin, do you know who I am?" Arthur suddenly asked.

Merlin snorted, "Is this a trick question?" He eyed Arthur, who shook his head.

"I'm only trying to determine how severe the damage to your head is. Just humor me," Arthur said, gently.

"You are clotpole." Merlin answered with a sad smile, and Arthur, who didn't notice the sorrow in Merlin's eyes, glared at him. "You are also known as Arthur Pendragon; king of Camelot." Merlin offered.

"Good. What about the man in there?" He asked, referring to Gaius.

"His name is Gaius; he is the castle physician, and my guardian." The warlock replied, confidently. Arthur, satisfied with the given answer, nodded again.

"Now, who are you?"

"I'm Merlin from Ealdore," Merlin said, thinking it was a sufficient answer.

Arthur widened his eyes slightly, prompting Merlin for more. The latter shrugged and said, "I'm also your servant."

"Back to joking, are you, Merlin?" Arthur said, "You haven't been my servant for over four years, and believe me those years were by far, some of the best ones in my life. You were such a useless servant, and we both know why." Arthur winked and hit Merlin playfully in the shoulder. Merlin stared at the king with utter shock, his throat went dry.

"I'm not your servant?" Merlin managed to say. Arthur shook his head, and Merlin's blood went cold. Nevertheless, it was a chance for Merlin to find out more about this…this new opportunity; this new life.

"Arthur, if I'm not your servant, then what do I do?"

"Since you insist on acting ignorant, let me enlighten you; you are the court sorcerer, my brother-in-law…and…"Arthur stopped himself. He narrowed his eyes, rubbing his chin, pondering something. "Or is it half brother-in-law, since Morgana is my half-sister?" He shook his head."Anyway-"

"Stop!" Merlin yelped, "When you say I'm your brother-in-law…" Merlin laughed nervously "…you mean that I'm married to…" he gulped, "Morgana?"

"Yes," Arthur replied, leaning his head against the wall.

"No." Merlin shook his head, not willing to believe it. "No, no way!" He said, again.

"Yes." Arthur confirmed, closing his eyes with a sigh.

"And you agreed?" Merlin snapped.

"Are you kidding? I almost killed you, Merlin."

"Why didn't you?" Merlin whined, he turned to the wall, and hit his head against it few times. Arthur chuckled, "Because, Morgana would have killed me." He replied simply. "Merlin, you don't look so good. You sure you're alright?"

It was too much information; Merlin was still trying to grasp the reality he was in. He turned pale and felt like he was about to throw up.

Merlin never got a chance to answer as Gaius opened the door, asking them inside. Arthur straightened up, and followed Gaius inside. As for Merlin, he struggled to move his body; his legs were heavy and he couldn't breathe. He was struck by what Arthur had just told him.

'_This is far more serious than I ever suspected. What kind of new chance is this? Me? Married to Morgana?' _Tentatively, he followed the two men inside.

Morgana was awake and she looked pale, leaning against the headboard. Her eyes were bloodshot and tired.

"Morgana," Arthur exclaimed, rushing toward her. He sat beside her, taking her hand in his.

"Let me have a look at you, Merlin." Gaius said, leading Merlin to sit on a chair, facing the siblings.

"You scared me." Arthur confessed and ran a hand through her hair, affectionately. "I think you finally managed to damage Merlin. He's acting weirder than usual."

She laughed softly, and placed her head on Arthur's shoulder. He wrapped his arms around Morgana, who welcomed the embrace, and replicated his action.

"I apologize for worrying you, Arthur. It just… it was a very disturbing nightmare."

'_What the bloody hell is happening?' _

Was he wrong? Was Morgana not…

"Someone wanted to kill me," She admitted, her voice was trembling. Arthur rubbed her back, comforting her. Merlin's jaw dropped.

"He stabbed me with a sword, Arthur." Her eyes flicked up, locking her gaze with Merlin's. She smirked, "I'm so scared, Arthur."

"Don't worry, no one will hurt you. I'll always protect you."

"She's alright, Gaius?" Arthur asked the physician, who looked up, he patted Merlin on the shoulder and offered him a small smile. He turned his attention back to Arthur, nodding, "She's fine. She's just exhausted, I suspect it's due to lack of sleep.

Arthur sighed in relief, "And the child?"

"Is fine too."

As the king and the physician conversed, Merlin and Morgana were glaring at each other. Neither could read the others expression, but both knew nothing good was going to happen.

Gaius left, shortly after he gave both Morgana and Merlin each a sleeping drought.

"Did you hear that? You are fine." Arthur smiled at Morgana and kissed her temple, resting his hand on her belly, "Both of you."

He stood up and made his way to the door.

"You're leaving?" Merlin jumped to his feet. He glanced at Morgana, before quickly returning his gaze back to Arthur. The King nodded.

"Believe it or not, Merlin, I'm competent enough to rule my Kingdom, without my court sorcerer for a day."

"I know," Merlin agreed "I'm coming with you." He announced but Arthur, shaking his head stopped him.

"No, I can see that you are not feeling well. Maybe you should get some rest." He suggested, "Besides…" Arthur marched to Merlin, and moved closer to whisper in his ear, "Stay with your wife, Merlin. Can't you see that she's unwell? What's the matter with you?"

Merlin nodded and didn't utter another word.

Once the door closed and they were left alone, Merlin gritted his teeth.

"Is this of your doing, Emrys?"

"So now, I'm Emrys? You almost had me fooled, Morgana."

"You didn't answer my question." She said, her voice cold and threatening.

"No. I don't think I'm strong enough to cause this." He snapped at her, "Whatever this is!"

"Really?" She challenged. "I don't believe you."

"I didn't ask you to."

"Yes, well, you and I are both very aware of how tremendous your powers are. And if you want anything… say, bringing back Arthur? We know nothing can stop you."

He went to table in the middle of the room, where Gaius had placed the two sleeping droughts for them. He took both and walked back to her.

"Drink." He handed her the vial, and moved to the other side of the bed.

"That's true. However, if I truly did this, why would I bring you back? You've done nothing but try to ruin the lives of the people who cared for you."

She shrugged, opening the bottle, he did the same.

"I'm quite certain that I'm just a minor inconvenience, in your big plan to achieve Albion. You killed me once, Merlin; we both know you won't hesitate to do it again."

Not expecting this answer, Merlin almost chocked, he started to cough.

She grinned, and swallowed the liquid in one gulp.

"It's different."He told her, he knew she wouldn't attempt anything, they still didn't know exactly where they were and how they ended up there. They still had so little information about this place, this new reality.

"Why?" She asked, lying back on the bed. "Because, I'm with a child or because I'm carrying your child?" she asked, emphasizing the words 'your child'_._

He shook his head, "Because, you and I both heard what Arthur had said, I'm his court sorcerer, which means that magic has been restored to Camelot. That's what you wanted, Morgana, you won't do anything to jeopardize it." He spoke as if he knew her, and that angered her, but the affect of the sleeping drought started to have its toll on them, she yawned.

He rested his body next to hers. They were both staring at the ceiling, with only a few inches separating them.

"How come you're so calm about this, Morgana?" He wondered aloud.

"Maybe because I've yet to fully comprehend what's going on? I'm still…"

"Haunted by those memories," He finished for her.

"Yes," She whispered, sleepily.

"What are you going to do when it finally sinks in?"

She didn't answer him, and Merlin thought that she might have fallen asleep. He turned his head to where she was laying, and almost yelped when he found her looking at him. She shifted and turned on her other side, so she could face him.

"Then, I'll kill Arthur and I'll find a way to have my vengeance, Emrys."

Merlin smiled.

"Good luck with that."

They both closed their eyes, letting the droughts take over. Before Merlin fell asleep, he heard Morgana say, in a tone thick with mockery, "Sleep well, husband."

* * *

**_Here's the deal, when I first planned this story , I had Merlin waking up to the new reality then changed my mind, I wanted it to be Morgana..._**

**_And as you can see, none of that happened, all I ask for you is to be patient in case you had to wait more than a week for an update._**

**_If you liked this chapter and still wish to read more of this fiction then leave me a review._**


	3. Chapter 3

_**Obligatory disclaimer**_:Merlin and all associated creative properties belong to BBC. I don't claim any said property as my own, and I make no monetary profit from this fan-made story. All creative property not associated with said channel belong to me, and their use is limited to my express permission. Thank you.

* * *

**_Chapter 3 : The beginning_**

* * *

Merlin sat down on the ground, he leaned his head against a tree with a sigh. Blinking twice, he was close to tears which had already formed in his eyes. He took a deep, shaky breath and cleared his sore throat.

Merlin was torn between happiness and freaking out; happiness that, somehow, he was granted another chance to achieve his destiny and Albion, and freaking out because he was clueless and ignorant as to what might have resulted to this reality he was in.

Another deep breath, he had left Morgana asleep. His mind had been set on one thing. Heading toward the only thing that had both the ability and knowledge to explain what was happening; the Great Dragon.

But he had gone to the caves under the castle, and went to the forest, attempting to summon the dragon. He had screamed its name so hard, and so many times that he was currently left with a sore throat, and a rough voice. He was even more devastated than he had been before.

Sitting alone in the clearing had made him lose track of time, having no real idea how long he'd been sitting out there. His mind was blank and his heart was crushed into so many little pieces. A serpent of worry began to coil and hiss in his stomach, as he thought of what that indicated. If he was unable to summon the dragon, what did that mean? Was it dead? No, that was impossible.

His shook that thought away, he would not make any assumptions without proof and solid evidence.

How could he get to the bottom of this? He wondered with a heavy heart. Frustrated, he ran a hand through his hair. He sighed, both defeated and overwhelmed. He stood with difficulty, his legs aching from sitting too long.

He had been given another opportunity, he was not about to ruin it by questioning why it happened. He should be grateful to whatever higher power that offered it to him. Now he needed to do whatever he could to make sure that Morgana would not mess it up with her obsession of claiming the thrown. No matter the cost.

* * *

Morgana woke up, curled on her side. Upon opening her eyes, she inspected the other side of the bed, alert that it was empty. Perhaps the chamber was empty too.

If it wasn't for the fact that she was currently in her bedroom, she would have thought everything had been a dream and that everything she experienced was due to her imagination. But no such luck, she thought, disappointedly as her eyes traveled down to her belly which was still swollen proving her mental point.

She reached out a hand and touched the other half of the mattress, it was cold. She noted. Merlin must have been gone for a while now. She sighed in relief; that would give her chance to ponder everything.

She rolled over, so she now lay on her back. She adjusted her pillow until she found a comfortable position, and hooked an arm under her head, watching as shadows played across the ceiling and overhead rafters.

She was not sure how she should be reacting to what was happening. She drew in a deep breath, currently there was no one to talk to about these changes except for Merlin. But she wasn't sure how the conversation would go; she needed to start one first and see.

She had no idea how things ended up this way, she only possessed a vague knowledge that caused a slight tremor to run through her body; a knowledge which consisted of magic returning back to Camelot, being married to Merlin, and actually approving of Arthur to rule the kingdom.

She closed her eyes for a second, her mind going through the different scenarios that could have caused this life. There were many variables and events that could be the reason, there were too many. She wasn't sure if she could list them all.

A knock on the door caught her attention, and she turned her head toward the door. She thought that it would be Merlin. The person didn't wait for permission, and opened the door. She was mistaken, she realized as Gwen poked her head through in, her eyes brightening when they landed on Morgana.

"You're awake," The queen said, opening the door wider and entering the chamber. Her face breaking into a big grin, once she closed the door behind her.

"I am sorry, I would have come sooner but I know how much you need to rest and sleep." Gwen moved closer, pulling a chair along with her, depositing it next to the bed. Her eyes were concerned and caring, something that made Morgana's blood boil. Quickly, she became distracted staring at the crown that decorated Gwen's head. It took all her power not to throw that traitor across the room and take back what was rightfully hers.

'_That's mine!'_ She thought angrily. Regardless, she forced her lips to quirk up and form a fake smile as Gwen made herself comfortable.

"Good morning, Gwen." She greeted. Morgana sat up, resting her head against the headboard.

There was small pause between the two women. Not an awkward one, well at least not for Gwen.

Morgana had forgotten how to speak civilly to Gwen a long time ago.

"Where is Merlin?" A perplexed Gwen asked a while later, looking around her, searching for the man in question.

Morgana shrugged her shoulders, "I don't know. He was gone when I woke up," She answered honestly.

To Morgana's surprise, Gwen laughed softly. "I assumed that he would not leave your side until you were fine."

"I am fine." Morgana insisted, her voice raising a little but not loud enough for Gwen to notice how angry Morgana was.

Upon hearing the answer, the smile left the queen's features as she placed her hand on top of Morgana's.

"You had another nightmare?" Gwen wondered, she squeezed Morgana's hand slightly. The pregnant lady hated the sympathetic look the other woman was giving her.

'_I'm living in one.'_ Morgana wanted to say but instead she settled for a nod.

"A vision?" Gwen promoted.

"Not all my nightmares are visions, Gwen. Believe it or not sometimes a nightmare is merely a nightmare, nothing less and nothing more." Morgana snapped her voice loud and harsh.

Gwen was taken aback by the sudden change in demeanor. She leaned back against the chair. Her eyes were showing her astonishment.

Morgana quickly realized her slip.

"I'm sorry…"

"I'm very sorry."

Both ladies said at the same time and Morgana looked away from Gwen.

"Morgana," Gwen said softly. Morgana turned her head in Gwen's direction absently.

"Listen to me…"Gwen added "I won't lie to you; I will not tell you that I understand what you go through with your nightmares or visions, or whatever they are."

"Gwen …" Morgana tried to interrupt her.

"I'm certainly not Merlin. I know he is your husband and you trust him more than anyone else. You two have been through a lot together. But, I have been your friend for a long time now. If anything is bothering you can tell me. I'm always here for you."

Morgana choose not to reply, instead she just nodded her head.

Gwen was satisfied with that unuttered answer. She got up, "I'm going to fetch you something to eat. You must be starving."

Morgana would have declined the offer if it were not for the growl that escaped her stomach.

Gwen smiled at that, "I think the child is hungry too...I will…" She trailed off, her eyes widening slightly as if she had remembered something, her hand only few inches away from the door knob.

"Have you told Merlin, yet?" She asked her offer to bring food to Morgana forgotten.

Morgana narrowed her eyes, pondering her choices of replies; either way Merlin would have absolutely no clue what Gwen was speaking of, so Morgana replied with 'no' , shaking her head.

Gwen moved away from the door and rolled her eyes.

"Morgana!" Gwen grumbled. She shrugged her shoulders and shook her head, disbelievingly.

"I can believe how stubborn you can be." She crossed her arms over chest. "Why haven't you told him yet?"

'_Because I have no idea what you are talking about!' _Morgana relied mentally.

Gwen's question was met with complete silence from Morgana's part.

"Do you know how happy Merlin will be? I really can't believe you have not told him yet." She said again.

'_I don't want him to be happy.' _She wanted to scream.

"I forgot." Morgana, this time, said in a guilty tone.

"There is no winning with you," Gwen paused. "I know you want to wait until the child comes, possibly because you don't believe it, but Merlin deserves to know that you are carrying his son. Another generation of Dragon lord, even if the vision came from another seer, you still ought to tell him." With that said, Gwen left Morgana alone to her own thoughts.

'_A son'_ Morgana gasped, her hand resting absently on her stomach.

her eyes widening slightly as she fully grasped what Gwen had said. ' a new generation of dragon lords.' Merlin was dragon lord?

The realization made her a little lightheaded. No wonder he was able to obtain a sword forged with a dragon's breath and that would easily explain his great powers.

For the first time ever, Morgana truly believed that she did not stand a chance against Merlin.

* * *

There was a knock on the door some time later.

"Enter," Morgana called, loud enough for the person on the other side to hear her.

A girl, no more than twenty-years old entered, carrying in her hands a tray of food.

"Where is Gwen?" Morgana asked, standing up.

"Oh! The queen she asked me to bring this for you, she went to check on the prince."

"The prince? Who is he?" Morgana wondered, walking to the window and opening it, allowing the gentle breeze to blow against her face. She turned to look at the servant, and was surprised to see the latter giving her a confused look.

"Prince Edward," The young woman replied. Morgana instantly understood what she meant.

Arthur and Gwen had a son, an heir to the throne. That certainly would complicate things more.

"Leave." Morgana commanded with a firm voice, and the girl obeyed immediately.

As the girl swung the door open, another figure appeared just in front of her and she yelped.

Morgana turned around to see Gaius, entering her chamber. The girl, after apologizing to him, disappeared quickly.

"I see you are already on your feet." Gaius said, eying the tray of food on the table before glancing at her. "Have you eaten anything yet?"

Morgana shook her head, "I lost my appetite." She told the physician and closed the window.

Gaius quirked an eyebrow at her, "No such thing, you must eat."

Morgana fought the urge to tell him that he had no authority over her, and no right to tell her what she must and must not do.

"I'll eat when I am hungry. Is everything alright?" Morgana asked in an attempt to alter the subject.

Gaius shrugged, "that's what I am here to find out. Let me take a look at you, and see how you are doing." He walked toward her, taking her by the arm gently, and leading her back to the bed.

"How did you sleep? Well, I hope?" She nodded as Gaius checked her eyes.

She watched him closely as he got into his physician mode. He gently pressed his hand to her side of the belly.

"Do feel any pains?"

"No," Morgana replied. He was very close to her; she could see the small smile on his face.

Gaius did not leave until he made Morgana finish all the food that was on the tray.

* * *

She eventually ventured from her room to walk around the castle, even taking up the nerve to go to the market. Everything looked familiar, ever the same. At first, it took her a while to get used to not being feared and shied away from. She had been Camelot's most terrifying enemy. For her to walk through its halls and corridors and on its ground, without anyone pointing at her or screaming for their lives was a huge change. The fact that everybody knew her, addressed her not as the king's ward or as the powerful queen she had been, was strange.

They loved her, bowed as she passed them, wished her the best luck with her pregnancy and respected her.

She even saw a few people using magic. She had been stunned at first, secretly waiting for the knights of Camelot to come rushing to arrest the sorcerers, she even readied herself to defend one of them, but none of that happened. No one yelled signaling the presence of a sorcerer. It was all very natural for them; it made her confused by how quickly the people of Camelot came to accept magic. After years of living under the tyrant, and the laws against the practice and the use of magic, she thought it would be harder for them to trust magic again. But here she was, astonished by the lack of fear. Somehow Arthur and Merlin had managed to achieve what she believed to be impossible.

Speaking of the devils, she spotted them ahead, with Gwaine following. Gwaine was alive. All sorts of people were coming back from the dead; it didn't surprise her much. After all, things were very different here, she needed to accept that.

Merlin seemed to be leaning most of his weight on Gwaine, who had Merlin's arm over his shoulder.

The three men saw her and started to make their way in her direction.

"Everybody is alive," Merlin squealed, laughing.

Morgana looked over at Gwaine then back to Arthur.

"I know. What a joy." She replied, her tone dripping with sarcasm.

But Merlin furrowed his brow, glancing up at Arthur.

"Well, not everybody. Uther is dead." He added mostly to Morgana, his face breaking into a big grin.

Morgana, of course, was well aware of that fact; it didn't take a genius to know that.

If magic had been restored back to Camelot, something that would never have happened if Uther still had breath in his lungs, then yes, he was dead.

"Can you be less enthusiastic about it?" Arthur asked in annoyance. "He was my father despite his flaws."

Merlin tried to suppress his laughter, biting his bottom lip. "I'm sorry." He tried to look remorseful, failing miserably.

Both Arthur and Morgana rolled their eyes at him, while Gwaine laughed hard, clapping Merlin on the back.

"Doesn't it make you wonder?" Arthur asked Morgana, while shaking his head at the other two men.

"Wonder about what?" Morgana inquired.

"What is it about Merlin that you find appealing?"

"Hey!" Merlin chimed in. "I'm handsome. That lady from the tavern said so." He reminded him, forgetting that that incident had happened in his reality, so Arthur would have no idea what Merlin was speaking of.

"Perhaps, it is the ears." Gwaine teased, touching Merlin's ear and pulling it.

Merlin slapped his hand away, "I happen to have very beautiful ears."

Morgana observed the interaction and then replied to Arthur's question, "I have not stopped asking myself that question."

* * *

Morgana opened the door, allowing the two men to drag Merlin inside and place him on the bed. They were still laughing about how Merlin seemed to have fallen asleep on the way there.

Morgana watched Arthur from the corner of her eye, his guard was down, the whole situation made it easy for her to strike. However, the presence of Gwaine was a problem; he was more of a nuisance to her though than a real issue.

Well, that plus the extra weight of her stomach that she would continue to carry until she found a way to solve this whole thing, or else she would go into labor. Not something she wanted to deal with.

"Do you need anything else, Morgana?" Arthur asked, while Gwaine marched toward the door.

Morgana shook her head. "Everything is alright, Arthur. Don't worry yourself over me, I am quite well."

Arthur simply shrugged and squeezed her forearm before heading to the door, where Gwaine waited outside.

"I apologize for…" He gestured to Merlin. "He needed to loosen up a bit."

She wished Gwaine and Arthur a goodnight. As soon as the door closed, the fake smile that she put on fell from her face.

She turned her attention back to Merlin, whose feet were on the floor and his upper body lying on the bed. He looked untroubled and relaxed, she straightened her shoulders.

'_What would she do with him?' _She wondered, her eyes widening as a thought hit her.

Walking closer to him, she extracted her dragger (she had found it among her things, not hidden, but she had reasoned that she might need it.) releasing it from its sheath. Her lips quirked up, perhaps this day would not be a complete waste after all. She considered the circumstance she was in.

She was with her nemesis, who happened to be very weak and vulnerable at the moment. She would not get a better chance; she could have her revenge now.

'_How_ _have I longed and waited for it?'_

The smile turned into a cocky grin, her eyes sparkling with mischief.

"At last," Morgana whispered, raising her knife high above her head, her grin growing ever wider. Her heartbeat sped up, the anticipation making her hand tremble and sweat. She couldn't believe that she was so close to achieving everything she had been wishing for. Maybe not everything, but it was a step toward her goal. First Merlin and eventually Arthur. She would find away to solve the Edward problem, then and only then, would she have what was rightfully hers – Camelot.

She took a few more steps closer to him, confident. However, she stopped abruptly when Merlin's eyes fluttered open. They were disoriented and unfocused.

For a second she assumed that he would fall asleep again. Nevertheless, that didn't happen, she studied his eyes; they were sad, bloodshot and she could easily see the tears that had formed in them. He blinked twice, turning his head from side-to-side, as if trying to identify his surroundings. He proceeded to raise his head, eyes landing on her.

Regardless of the pain that seemed to be radiating from him; a pain that she could oddly sense and feel, she was determined. Her mind set on finishing things that very night. Yet again, Merlin seemed to have his own plans. He always did, why would tonight be any different?

Somehow, after struggling, he finally managed to sit down. He was facing Morgana, who happened to be standing only few feet away from him. She felt paralyzed by the look that he was giving her, a look that spoke volumes and made her heart skip a beat and the air to leave her lungs.

He tried to stand up but he was too drunk to have the control over his legs. After a few attempts, he decided to remain sitting. Morgana observed him with caution and complete silence, her knife safely hidden behind her back, for the fear that the mere sight of it might sober Merlin up. She tried to shake the eerily feeling away, but it had somehow managed to clutch her heart.

Merlin watched her, his eyes fixed on her and his lips trembling. A single tear escaped his eye, sliding down cheek. He bit his bottom lip hard, and wiped his eyes, sniffing.

It confused her to see him like this. The last time he was like this, so broken and miserable had been when he poisoned her. Her eyes widened, what if he was going to kill her, she cleared her throat.

The next thing she knew, Merlin's hands wrapped around her waist, his head on her belly as he started to cry.

That startled her immensely, causing her to almost drop the sharp weapon.

"Merlin…"she whispered, confused but still angry.

"I am so sorry I killed you, Morgana. Have I told you so before?" Her mind went through the memories of events that had actually happened only the day before.

She shook her head, doubting that Merlin had seen her answer. Sobbing, he sniffed again.

He continued to apologize over and over again, until Morgana got sick of hearing it. She tightened her hold on the knife. She readied herself for what to come. Victory.

"I should have tried harder…" he stuttered and mumbled. "There were so many other ways to save you."

"I did not need saving," She interrupted him, hissing through gritted teeth.

"Will you forgive me?" He asked her next, he raised his head and their gazes locked. He was pleading with her, begging to the point that if it was anybody else, she would have thought the whole scene heartbreaking.

She refrained from answering, and more tears continued to fall from his sad eyes.

She looked up, unable to regard him anymore. She was confused, mixed feeling washed over her and she felt her whole body quiver.

She tried to shove him away with her free hand, pushing him with all her power, but to no avail. He was holding onto her steadfastly.

"You of all people, you knew how hard and lonely… it could be…" He trailed off, his silence brought her back to reality and she looked down to him. Her lips pressed into a thin line.

"And for that, you will pay…" she thought aloud.

But suddenly, Merlin unhooked his arms as a consequence, freeing her. Before she had a chance to distant herself from him, the greatest sorcerer to ever live threw up. Morgana's face screwed up.

This time she did move away.

"I think I'm going to throw up…" He added afterward, glancing up at her, his eyes apologetic. He wiped his mouth with the hem of his shirt.

"Really?" She snorted, taking few steps backward again. Merlin looked like a lost child.

Morgana narrowed her eyes at him; he covered his mouth again, making a gagging sound.

She rolled her eyes and she mentally slapped herself.

She was the Lady Morgana, she tried to remind herself, the last highest priestess of old religion. If she were to have her reprisal, she would do it the old fashion way. Her face would be the last thing he would see, and the last thing he would feel would be the pain that he had put her through. She would make him pay, not while he was drunk, that wouldn't do. He needed to be attentive. She would make sure of that. She would crush him the same way he crushed her.

The smell of vomit reached her nostrils, and she clapped a hand over her mouth and nose. The smell was too strong for her to handle, she felt the bile rise in her throat. She glared down at her own tainted dress, the floor then up back to Merlin.

He smiled nervously at her, reading her angry expression. Without looking she slapped him in the face, he fell backward easily and didn't get up again.

Morgana shook her head at his unconscious form.

'_That was easy.'_

It did not take her long to change into her nightgown and clean the floor. She left her chamber; she was gone for a long time before she re-entered her room. Merlin was still out cold.

'_I must have hit him really hard_,' she thought. Once she closed the door, she went through her night routine.

She adjusted his legs, so he was now lying fully on the bed. As much as she loved the idea of him sleeping in uncomfortable position, and the outcome of such wretched sleep, she didn't want anyone beside herself to see him like that and get suspicious.

She went to the other side, dragging him up with difficulty onto the bed. She sighed, despite Merlin's scrawny body, he was quite heavy. Once she adjusted him, her eyes turned gold and the light died out.

She rested her tired body next to his. She loathed the idea of them sharing a bed together for the second time, at least willingly.

But she didn't have another choice. She closed her eyes, thinking about the next morning. She and Merlin would have to talk everything through. Up until then they had yet to discuss these changes and new transformations.

She fell asleep almost immediately. The worries of the day, the revelations no matter how small they were, had been shoved into the back of her mind. She was already used to not felling guilty; after all she truly believed she had no conscience.

* * *

_An awful, high pitched scream forced its way from deep in her lungs and out through her trembling lips. Clenching her chest, she sat up straight. Her breathing raging and uncontrolled, she started to sob._

* * *

**_A/N:_** Sorry of not updating last week. Grazejen edited this chapter. All thanks to her.

If you like it, don't be shy and leave me a review...


	4. Chapter 4

_**Obligatory disclaimer**_:Merlin and all associated creative properties belong to BBC. I don't claim any said property as my own, and I make no monetary profit from this fan-made story. All creative property not associated with said channel belong to me, and their use is limited to my express permission. Thank you.

* * *

_ **Chapter 4**: **A small step** _

* * *

An awful, high pitched scream forced its way from deep in her lungs and out through her trembling lips. Clenching her chest, she sat up straight. Her breathing ragged and uncontrolled, she started to sob.

Her scream startled Merlin and he snapped into a sitting position.

He moaned at the sudden movement he made and rubbed the side of his head. He felt the beginning of a headache.

He blinked twice, allowing his eyes to adjust to the darkness that enveloped the place. He heard Morgana panting.

"Why are you yelling?" He groaned. He looked over at her and swallowed hard at the sight his eyes beheld.

He never truly witnessed the replication of her nightmares, never seen the fear that her features demonstrated as a result, his stomach twisted in knots. He gulped as a tremor ran throughout his body.

His headache forgotten, he focused his attention on her. Regardless of the loathing and abhorrence they felt toward each other, feelings Merlin shoved away that moment, he hesitantly placed his hand on her shoulder.

The movement alerted Morgana and she turned her head to him. Tears, continued to fall freely, her lips apart, her breaths came in short gasps as she chocked on the sobs that were already shaking her body. He lost his voice, his mouth opened and closed again, no words were spoken. She merely stared at him, her eyes widening as she became aware of his hand on her and she shrugged it off quickly.

"Morgana, are you alright?" He finally found his voice, the question came in a whisper.

No response, just gaping at him; she glanced around her, sniffing.

A deep breath in, she tried to calm herself, she closed her eyes, shoving the horrible images away , deep inside her mind, out of her reach. She proceeded to leave the bed, leaving a bewildered Merlin behind.

She appeared to be fine, having taken control over her breathing and her eyes dry, no longer glittering with newly formed tears. He watched her move to the window, standing next to it, her back to him. He no longer can see her face. The moonlight was the only source of light in the room.

"Morgana." he called her once more, softly. He sighed and reluctantly stood up, getting off the bed. He was lightheaded, his vision was fuzzy, and he rubbed his eyes, willing the dizziness away.

He breathed in, walking to her and stopping only a few feet away.

"Are you alright?" she heard him ask her again and she hated how weak and fragile she appeared to him. She opened the window allowing the night gentle and cold breeze in, hoping it would erase the evidence of her vulnerability. She was afraid to reply; afraid that her voice might fail her too, her emotions were already out of her control. So she continued to ignore him, continued to take deep breaths, hopping he would go to sleep, leave her alone. But he did not; he stood there, just watching her.

Another deep breath in, she closed her eyes. Turning around, she exhaled slowly, her eyes flickered open and they locked gaze. Merlin watched silently as all the emotions left her features, her face was blank.

"You must be pleased, seeing me like this?" He shook his head.

"I'm not like you Morgana. I can't be pleased over someone's distress."

She snorted, raising an eyebrow. "Somehow, I find it hard to believe you." She told him. He could barely keep his eyes open, glancing back to the bed; he could almost hear it calling him. He felt so tired except he needed to stay awake. He was not going to leave her like this, even if she was trying very hard to hide her worry.

Wordlessly, his eyes turned gold and the whole room lighted up.

They both shielded their eyes at the sudden brightness. Merlin rubbed his eyes again, yawning.

_Much better_. He thought and looked to her and was surprised to see her staring at him with a dumbstruck expression.

He scoffed. "What?"

"Nothing…" she shook her head, taking a step backward. "It's just… that was the first time I saw you use magic." She confessed, stuttering, her voice shaking, unsure.

His frown deepened, he opened his mouth to ask her to explain more but Morgana spoke, elaborating.

"I meant...not as Emrys, but as …well you." She raised her hand and pointing at him.

"But Emrys and I …"He paused, tilting his head to the side "we are the same person?" He reasoned, sitting on the edge of the bed.

"Well, not to me…"she told him "I am yet to believe that you have magic." She reached her hand, grabbing a vial from the table. Morgana walked and handed it to him.

Her hand still outreached, he observed her with confusion and suspicion. His eyes were flickering from the bottle and her face.

"What for?" he asked.

"Hangover." She replied calmly.

Sensing his obvious distrust and skepticism, she rolled her eyes. "Honestly! It is for your hangover. Gaius made it."

Still not completely certain, he hesitated for a second before he took hold of the bottle, opening and sniffing it. He glanced up and saw her smiling wickedly at him.

"If I wanted to kill you, do you not think I would have attempted to do so while you were drunk, or better yet, asleep? Wouldn't it be easy, quick and effective," She bit down her lower lip, "but fortunately for you, painless."

He narrowed his eyes. "You are right" he stated and emptied the contents of the bottle in one gulp. Merlin squinted at the horrible and bitter taste. It was queasy but he forced himself to swallow it.

Morgana thought that he might throw up again so she distanced herself from him. Sitting on the chair by the table, she smirked at the face he made.

The effects were quick and before he knew it, the headaches as well as the haziness that clouded his eyes were gone. He looked around, still not completely used to everything that was happening around him; well, them.

The calm and the quiet that surrounded him made him realize how late it was.

He spotted the dagger on her night stand. He quirked an eyebrow up.

"What's that?" He inquired and she understood his question.

"A dagger." She answered, her expression deadpanned.

He sighed and reached for it. "Why would you need it?"

She shrugged "the truth?" She asked him, crossing her arms over her chest.

He nodded, inspecting the blade.

"Initially…"she started, uncrossing her arms and leaning forwards "I was going to drive it through you and watch you bleed to death."

"Oh!" He expressed, his eyes widening.

"But do not worry. Obviously, I did not carry on with my plan."

"Obviously." He whispered. He was furious at himself. Giving her an effortless opportunity to take his life. Everything would have been lost.

_Arthur was...no, is right, I am an idiot. _

"So you wanted to kill me?" He interpreted her words. She nodded her head, smiling airily.

"So you were lying to me earlier when you wanted me to drink that potion…"he started and she nodded again, no need to lie or be dishonest.

He scoffed "I should have known better." He said bitterly.

"You should have" she echoed. "But, I am giving you a warning; it will not be the last time. Mark my words Emrys, I will have my revenge."

"Why?" he asked, tossing the knife on the bed.

"Why am I giving you a fair warning?"

"No." he shook his head. "Why didn't you kill me?" He clarified, running a hand through his hair.

She inhaled and shrugged her shoulders. Morgana looked down, her right hand rubbing circles on her stomach.

"I believe that carrying a child has made me soft, Merlin." She mimicked him and he glared at her.

"I am serious Morgana." His voice rising for the first time. Seeing him like this she was reminded of Emrys, the old wrinkle-faced man. She wondered how she never made the connection, never seen the similarity between the two. But then again, she never, not in a million years would have suspected Merlin to possess magic. The thought of him being the most powerful sorcerer to ever live would not have crossed her mind, ever.

"Fine…"she snapped, glowering fiercely at him.

"I had every intension to do it, to kill, until you started to weep like a small child. Begging and pleading for my forgiveness" she spat, standing up. "You were so pathetic and weak. And I knew and was certain that seeing me like this…alive, furthermore, with your child." She was standing in front of him; she poked him in the chest.

"Guilt and self-reproach will eat you alive and I will stand by and watch you torture yourself for what you have done to me. After all, you do blame yourself for what I have become." She composed herself quickly and he looked down where she had jabbed him, because that was how it felt. Her words were a stab straight to his heart.

"Cold-hearted." He whispered under his breath, but by the glare she was giving him, he knew she heard him.

He swallowed hard. "I tried Morgana, I really did. But if the only way to end your constant threats and hatred toward Arthur and Camelot was killing you, _believe me_, I would not have hesitated to do it again."

Her expression mirrored his, both shocked and astonished, taken aback by what he uttered. He didn't mean to say that to her. Nevertheless, taking it back was not an option, since what he said was the truth and they both knew it.

"Now, who is the cold-hearted?" She smirked, trying to hide her utter astonishment.

"You and I are very much alike Merlin, we are ready…"

"I am nothing like you and I will never be!" He yelled.

She ignored his interruption and added firmly "…both ready to do whatever it might take to achieve our dreams" she paused "Perhaps one day you will come to realize how similar we are to each other, despite the fact that we wish for different things. You fail to see it now, blind by the fear that you might actually be like me."

They were glaring at each other. Their eyes reflecting their aversion.

A knock on the door startled them; they both shared a look before, Morgana headed to the door, answering it. She pulled open revealing a knight.

"I heard screaming coming from here? Is everything alright M'lady?" he asked her, his eyes looking over her shoulders, trying to scan the chamber.

"Oh!" Her lips curved up, forming a big and shy smile. She leaned her head against the door frame. "Worry not. Merlin was going to the privy and spotted a spider." She winkled her eyebrows at him, glancing at Merlin then back to the knight. "Who knew that Merlin could be easily frightened by a little, black and hairy spider?"

Merlin gasped from behind her and her smile turned into a grin.

"But it was a woman's voice?" The knight questioned, not quite believing what she was saying.

Merlin appeared, poking his head, resting it on her shoulder and offering a lopsided smile.

"It was." He affirmed. "But it was not a scream." Morgana snorted but was intrigued to hear to what he was going to say. She was surprised to feel him warp his hand around her waist.

"I'm sorry. We will try to be quiet next time." He took a deep breath, regretting what he was about to do. He leaned over and pressed a kiss to her neck. He felt her shiver under his touch.

"Right dear?" He addressed Morgana. She said nothing and he glanced up and winked at the man. The latter understood what Merlin meant, his cheeks reddened in embarrassment.

"I'm terribly sorry, Sire. I'll leave you to …well…have a great night." He addressed him as sire, if Merlin was stunned by it, he didn't show it.

Once the knight disappeared, he pulled away from her. She slammed to the door shut. He cringed, anticipating what was coming.

"What the hell was that?" She hissed. "I cannot believe you told such a thing."

He huffed. "What did you think? He thought that I scream like a woman."

"That is not what I told him" she argued.

He snorted "But you did implicate it. It's the same thing."

"Fine. You would think by now, Arthur would start to choose his knights more carefully. That man is stupid. We are both fully dressed, albeit I'm wearing a nightgown but look at you…" Merlin still had his trousers and both the shirt and the jacket on.

"How could he possibly believe what you said?" She wondered, shaking her head.

He shrugged, not answering. Felling uncomfortable discussing such a subject with her, he decided to say nothing, hoping that she would drop it.

Luckily for him, she didn't speak of it again, but instead she told him.

"It was not very clever of you to go to the tavern and get yourself drunk." She complained. "You could have slipped and started to mumble, telling…" Merlin cut her off.

"I know, you're right." He paused sat down, taking a deep breath. "It was not my plan."

"And what was your plan?"

"I saw Gwaine, he told me where he was going and I thought I could get him drunk. Hoping that maybe I could get some answers about this life."

"Did you?" He shook his head, "Arthur joined us and…"

"You ended up drunk, barely able to stand on your own." She finished for him.

"Not something I am proud of, believe me." He groaned.

"Well, I have been luckier than you." His eyes brightened up. She pointed toward to table, and he noticed for the first time half a dozen books on it.

Morgana helped herself with some water. "I went to the library." She continued.

"And you brought books?"

"History books." She clarified. Morgana yawned and stood up.

Merlin finally understood what she meant.

"Did you find anything?"

"A lot." her answer was short, she didn't elaborate. His curiosity building up, he grabbed one of the books. Before he opened it, he saw Morgana laying on the bed, her back to him. He sighed and turned his attention back to the book in his hands. _Time to get some information._

* * *

She felt a hand shaking her, urgently. Could vaguely hear her name being called out.

"Morgana, wake up. Wake up."

She groaned, cracking one eye open. She huffed when she saw his face.

"It is you." she acknowledged with growl. "What do you want?" She could see how shocked he was. It was understandable, because she had been when she'd first read those books.

He waved a book in front of her.

"This is impossible and unbelievable."

"Read the rest of the books Merlin, they all say the same thing." She said, yawing and closed her eyes again, going to back to sleep.

He shook her awake once more "I've read them all."

Her eyes fluttered open. "All?" She asked disbelievingly. "What time is it?" She sat up.

"It's morning." He answered her and she noticed the dark circles under his eyes and she scowled.

"You spent the whole night reading?" She questioned, rubbing her eyes.

He nodded. She stretched out, moaning in the process.

"This cannot be true, Morgana." Merlin said again. He placed the book on her night stand. "The druids wouldn't have done such a thing to one of their own."

She rolled her eyes. "I'm not one of them."

"Yes, you are." He exclaimed "You have magic."

She let out a forlorn sigh. "Merlin…" she began, crossing her arms over her chest… "Shortly after I had arrived to their camp, an army attacked them. Killing almost everyone…a massacre happened that day, all because Uther had thought that I had been kidnapped. It was my mistake. Do you really think they would be kind to me?"

"I…"he opened his mouth and closed, feeling lost of words. "I still cannot believe it" he sighed and ran a hand through his hair, frustrated.

"You have read the books; they all share the same thing, Merlin. When I returned to Camelot after Arthur so foolishly thought he had rescued me, it seemed that they had brought prisoners with him. One of them confessed that I had sought them out because I had magic , not been kidnapped by them. "

"But Uther refused to believe so…" Merlin chimed in.

"So he sent for the witch-finder."Morgana nodded, agreeing.

"And instead of Gaius getting tortured by him, you went through that." He shook his head. "How could Uther do that to you?"

She didn't comment on that, she simply said:

"Somehow I escaped before my trial and everything went downhill for Uther."

They sat in silence, letting the newly found information sink in. It was a lot to take in after all, but there were still unclear things, like what happened to Morgana after she ran away; where she stayed. They had to find out these things in another way.

"How are you feeling?" Morgana asked him after a while, when the silence became too awkward to bear.

He took a deep breath "Surprised, but relieved." He confessed with a small smile.

She quirked an eyebrow. "Relieved? How could you possibly be relieved after everything that you learned?" she snapped.

"I didn't mean it in a good way…" she snorted and he rolled his eyes.

"I just thought that the reason this happened was because I told you that I had magic." He shrugged. "But it wasn't."

"Just something that you don't have to blame yourself for." She told him, getting up.

"Where are you going?" he asked her, replicating her action.

"I'm famished. I am to get ready for the day." She answered him.

He frowned. "What am I supposed to do in the mean time?"

She smirked "Take those books back."

* * *

"Merlin! Slow down." Morgana grabbed his arm, stopping him in the process. They had just reached the bottom of the stairs, Morgana leaned her back against the wall.

Merlin did as he was told, frowning down at her. "You don't look so good." He observed.

"Of course, I am not fine, Merlin. Can't you see that I'm out of breath?" She hissed, trying to keep her voice down, so she wouldn't catch anyone's attention.

She glanced up. "Who knew how tiring descending the stairs could be?"

Merlin finally understood what she meant; he offered her a small and sympathetic smile. "Take as much time as you inquire Morgana. I'm not in hurry."

"You have to do better than that if you wish to appear as one of noblemen" she stated.

"After watching Arthur for seven years, I think I have a great idea how to act like them." He answered, starting to make their way toward the dining room.

"Really? How so?"

"All I have to do is act like a prat and they won't suspect a thing." He told her smugly. Morgana laughed despite herself.

"You think he is a prat?"

"A royal one…" He clarified, sadness overcoming him. "…but a great friend."

She stopped abruptly and so did he.

"Can I ask you something?" Merlin nodded.

"After you killed me…"She said in a whisper, just in case someone might hear them. "Did Arthur die?"

Merlin scowled, but nodded, uttering yes. Her lips curved up, forming a lopsided smile.

"You look pleased." He stated and she shrugged.

"At least I did not die in vain."

* * *

Three days passed and both Merlin and Morgana were extremely surprised at their power to control themselves. It was a wonder that they had not killed each other just yet.

They argued about almost everything and anything. From time to time, they would merely disagree just to annoy the other. Well, at least they consented on the sleeping arrangement. Of course, Merlin, ever the gentlemen, had let her take the bed and him the floor. They both had settled on locking the door during the night in order to prevent anyone walking in on them and getting suspicious. They would not allow an unfortunate mistake.

During the meals, Merlin and Morgana would eat with the king and queen. Merlin noted that Gaius, the majority of time preferred eating alone, in the comfort of his chamber.

Morgana discovered that she spent a great part of her time next to Gaius, being a healer and strong sorceress; the physician would seek her help with cases that science could not explain, or with making potions.

As for Merlin, he was fairly occupied with council meetings; accompanying Arthur in his hunting trips. All in all, Merlin realized that he still had to be with Arthur all day, saving and advising him. So nothing changed, except he no longer had to dress him and do his serving duties.

Merlin had caught Morgana, not once but twice, during dining, eyeing the knife before her, she would look between it and Arthur. Merlin, of course, had been keeping a sharp eye out on her, had noticed that and distanced the sharp weapon from her. She had responded by rolling her eyes and saying "You don't trust me? I'm hurt".

After the second time, he threatened to take away her magic and she reluctantly promised him that she would not kill Arthur; he glared at her, and she huffed and promised that she wouldn't kill anyone.

Morgana was making her way to the library, when she saw out of the corner of her eye, Merlin had been following her ever since she had left the dining room. She exhaled in annoyance. She decided to quicken her pace.

Merlin stopped abruptly, confused. Morgana was nowhere to be found, she was just walking in front of him.

He checked his surroundings, looking to both sides and yet there was no sight of her. He sighed and started to jog.

Suddenly, a hand came out of nowhere and he was violently pulled into an alcove.

Before he was fully hauled inside, he heard someone saying.

"Look who I found." Merlin yelped and saw Morgana staring wide-eyed at him. She gulped and made her way out of the alcove, hesitantly.

He did the same, fully emerging from there.

His eyes widened and his heart ached.

Merlin and Morgana, shocked, said respectively. "Freya?" "Mordred?"

* * *

_**Please review, if you liked it. I hadn't get many reviews last chapter, It was kind of disappointing.**_

_**I apologize for not updating last week. **_

_**I hope you liked the idea how the changes on this reality happened. Originally, I was saving the plot of another story but I didn't want the whole "Merlin told Morgana he had magic" cliche. **_


	5. Chapter 5

_**Obligatory disclaimer**_:Merlin and all associated creative properties belong to BBC. I don't claim any said property as my own, and I make no monetary profit from this fan-made story. All creative property not associated with said channel belong to me, and their use is limited to my express permission. Thank you.

**_On with the story :_**

* * *

Chapter 5 : Part I

* * *

They both stared back at the other two. Merlin felt lost, paralyzed. His whole body failed him. He wanted to run to her, take her in his arms but he was stuck in that position, staring like a fool.

There standing next to Mordred, who never looked more beautiful and more alive, was Freya.

Morgana, surprised too, noticed that Merlin had stopped breathing, his lips apart. She glanced at Mordred and the young woman. She concluded that her name must be Freya. She did not really care. She leaned closer to Merlin.

"Breath, Merlin," she whispered in his ear, glancing back at the pair. She was puzzled when she saw Freya looking between her and Merlin, taking a step back. The woman glanced at Mordred and nodded to him, she said something to him in a whisper that Morgana couldn't hear, and then practically ran the other way. Without looking back.

Morgana frowned, Merlin's heart sank.

Mordred, chuckling, approached them.

"That went well." He laughed at their expression.

"But she…she ran away." Merlin uttered, astonished, his eyes reflecting both his shock and sadness. Merlin continued to stare; he could still see Freya's back.

"Considering what happened last time she was here, I really do not blame her." Mordred replied. His laughter ceased but the smile remained on his face. "All thanks to mother." He added, patting Merlin in the back.

Merlin and Morgana's eyes doubled in size.

"Your mother is here?" Morgana wondered, her heart beating fast.

"Where is she?" Merlin asked. He and Morgana looked around them.

"I see you two decided to be humorous today." The druid boy raised his eyebrows. He moved closer to Morgana, leaning over, he pressed a gentle kiss to her temple; Morgana did her best not to gasp.

"I need to report to the king, I shall see you later mother." He stated and glanced at Merlin. " Be careful," He smirked at him and walked passed them. Neither of them moved. They turned around watching Mordred leave. They stood there for a couple of seconds, before Morgana ended the pregnant silence as she grabbed Merlin's arm, pulling him out of his state of bewilderment.

"I think I am going to faint" Morgana murmured. Worried, Merlin tightened his hold on her. Together they walked until they found a place where Morgana sat down and Merlin next to her.

"He called me mother." Merlin nodded his head, not really knowing what could be said in the light of this new discovery.

"What do you suppose he meant by that?" Morgana asked, her voice shaky and unsure.

Merlin swallowed hard, so Mordred was alive. Now he had to keep an eye on the druid boy as well. With both Morgana and Mordred in Camelot, Merlin was aware of how difficult his job to keep Arthur safe was. He still didn't trust Morgana completely; he'd be a fool if he would do so in such short time. Yet, he didn't know if Mordred was destined to kill Arthur in this life as well. His mind was churning through many possibilities.

He shook his head. "I don't know, Morgana…" His response was no help to explain the situation.

Morgana folded her hands in her lap, glanced at Merlin, her eyes met his. She could read his confusion

"I need to go...find…" He stuttered. She knew who he was referring to and it made no sense to her the sudden sorrow that washed over his face. To be honest, she didn't care. Whoever this woman was, she appeared to have quite the effect on Merlin. Morgana didn't think much of it. All her mind could focus and hear was the word Mother. The utterance that had came from Mordred's mouth.

As he said so, Merlin stood up. Puzzled by her lack of attentiveness, Merlin cleared his throat.

"Morgana?" He called out, nudging her shoulders, trying to gain her attention. He did, for she looked up at him, her brow furrowed.

"Go. Go find her Merlin." He took one last look at her before he ran in the direction of Freya.

Morgana sat there, staring ahead. But suddenly, her eyes widening, as her mind finally registered what the druid boy had said. She stood up as quick as she could be in her current state.

She knew exactly where to find Mordred.

* * *

She marched toward the throne room, when she reached it, she nodded her head to the two guards and they opened it for her, allowing her in. She went inside with steady steps.

She saw Arthur and Mordred conversing, yet she could not hear what they were saying. Her eyes were focused on one thing and one thing only.

Mordred.

She quickened her pace. The two men stopped talking looking at her.

"Morgana." she vaguely heard her brother call her name, could sense his annoyance. She shrugged it off.

"I gather you heard that Mordred came back." Arthur said when he realized that Morgana was ignoring him.

She opened her arms wide open, when she was close enough to them. She closed her eyes as she wrapped her arms around him, burying her face in the crook of his neck. She refused to cry. Mordred was alive; there was no reason for her to do so.

"You are fine." She confessed, her hands tightening her hold on him. Mordred embraced her back. She heard him chuckle, her heart clenched and she bit down her bottom lip, suppressing a gasp.

Arthur growled, standing up from his throne.

"Oh look…"He exclaimed, the two broke their hug. Morgana pulled Mordred at arm's length. Her eyes, bright with glee, she observed him, silently. "Surprisingly, he is still in one piece." Arthur derided and Morgana rolled her eyes at his words, but she glanced back at Mordred.

"I missed you so much." She whispered, her lips curved forming a big smile.

Mordred closed his eyes, briefly. He grimaced. Morgana saw that.

"Are you hurt?" She inquired her voice thick with worry. She tried to inspect him for any injuries.

"The only thing that got hurt is his pride." Arthur placed his hands on Morgana and pulled her next to him.

"For god's sake Morgana, he is a knight of Camelot," Arthur started, "Quit treating him like a child." He demanded in a firm voice.

Morgana quirked an eyebrow at Arthur. Was he really trying to doing that? Who did he think he was? The king? Well he was, but not to her.

Morgana considered what Arthur had said about Mordred not being a child; she wasn't blind, it was obvious to her since he was wearing the uniform of the knights. For a second she had to remind herself that….that this Mordred was different from the Mordred she had known before. This one didn't betray her, was not overcome with sadness and hurt that he had suffered as a child. This one had called her mother.

No, this one was nothing like the one she had know, the one she had buried, this Mordred looked, simply …happier. That thought made her smile.

"I was gone for only one week, nothing dangerous." Mordred told her, Morgana suspected that he was trying to reassure her.

"Morgana, he went to Ismere's kingdom. He is fine."

"Still…" Morgana sighed, "You sent him all alone. You did not send Sir Leon and Gwaine with him." She snapped at Arthur and he huffed.

"What if something happened?" Morgana countered, crossing her arms, glowering at the king who fought the urge to roll his eyes at her.

"Again, hee is a knight of Camelot. We already went through this prior to his departing; he is both old and strong enough to take care of himself. We all know how powerful he is. You of all people should know that, you taught him to heal, and Merlin, how to fight with magic. So please, stop worrying about him."

"He is right," Mordred agreed, nodding his head. He looked at Morgana…he frowned.

"Are you crying?" Morgana, having been shocked by what Arthur had said, failed to notice that tears had formed in her eyes. She touched her face, looking at her wet fingers, she glanced up.

"No…I am not" she said quickly, ignoring the proof. She wiped the tears away.

"This is not one of those moments, is it?" Arthur chimed in, growling.

"What moments?" Puzzled, Morgana asked, her eyes flickering between the two men before her.

"You know…" Mordred started but Arthur cut him off.

"…one minute you are talking normally and the next either you're crying your eyes out or you're laughing for no reason." Mordred cleared his throat, wincing at the king's choice of words, Morgana's frown deepened. "You make it sound like I am crazy."

Arthur snorted "We did consider that fact." Morgana wasn't amused by that.

She shook her head, "No, it is not one of those …moments."

"So you are fine?" Arthur asked and Morgana nodded.

"Magnificent," The king exclaimed, clapping his hands together. "Now that we established that Mordred is safe and sound, if you don't mind, he and I have important matters to discuss."

Morgana glared at Arthur, "As a matter of fact I do mind, I am staying here."

"Mother!" Mordred exclaimed, he rubbed his temple as a sign of his frustration, "I shall come find you once I'm finished." He paused "I promise." He smiled and gave her his best puppy dog eyes. Morgana narrowed her own.

"Fine" she huffed and turned around. "I will leave" she stated, addressing Arthur.

"Finally," The king exclaimed.

* * *

Morgana headed toward her chamber; opening it, she found Merlin sitting on the bed, pouting. He looked up, upon hearing the door, let out a forlorn sigh and then looked down at the floor. His shoulders slumped; his hair was messed up as if Merlin had run his hand through it so many times.

"Why the long face?" She asked, moving closer to the bed. She made her way to the other side of the bed and joined Merlin on it. He still did not reply. Merely shrugged.

"I gather your conversation with Freya didn't go the way you wished it to be." She assumed, her hands rested on her stomach, she waited for his answer.

Merlin shook his head. "I didn't even find her. I searched the whole castle and the city for her and yet no trace of her."

"So…" she began, looking over at him "Who is she?" Morgana asked.

Merlin took a deep breath in, he glanced up at her.

"Her name is Freya…"Merlin answered; his voice husky and that was all he told her. He stared at her, he leaned his head against the headboard. He blinked twice.

"That is something that I already know…" she said when he didn't say more. The emotions, with which his eyes burned, made her shiver. She swallowed hard, her throat was dry. Once again his eyes traveled down, and then he looked away.

They sat there for long period of time, each one absorbed by his own thoughts, the day was still young, yet its events, so far, had took them completely off guard. Understandable, everything they had seen for the past week were hard to comprehend. She still couldn't fully grasp what was happening. She supposed Merlin was going through the same. Despite the fact that everything he had ever wanted had became true, she knew that he was yet to accept these changes.

The long pause, finally, came to an end. Merlin put an end to it when he cleared his throat.

His eyes flickered up, meeting hers. He hesitated, that was quite obvious as he bit down his bottom lip, as if he was contemplating over the idea of telling her about such personal thing. Something he had told no one about. However, he had kept those memories inside for too long and he reached a phase when he felt unable to hold back how overwhelming and crushing they were to him. He simply needed to let it out, as if he speaking them out loud would ease his tormented soul.

So he opened up to her, he told her how he had freed Freya, how he had took care of her, how he had been thrown in dungeons when he attempted to bring her Arthur's food. She laughed and she said that she indeed recalled that incident, even though, deep down it felt like that had accrued in another life. Somehow, that was true…before he started to inform her of his plan to get her out of Camelot, Morgana cut him off.

"You care about her?" It came out as a question, even though she meant it as a statement. Her voice was soft, it might be due to the way he spoke, the look on his face and the way his eyes would flicker with sadness as he mentioned the curse or how they would brighten up with utter delight when he informed her of Freya's dream. The house by lake, and everything else.

Merlin merely hummed a 'yes'. His eyes refused to meet hers.

"I was going to…." he looked up, "I was going to give up everything for her…"

"Everything?" Morgana wondered in bewilderment. She frowned.

"My destiny, Albion, Arthur…." Merlin clarified. Morgana quirked an eyebrow. What did he mean by that?

Her frown deepened at the word destiny.

The first time she had heard the word destiny, it had been soon followed by the word doom; Emrys was her doom. She chose not to comment on that, dreading what he would say.

"But that didn't happen." Merlin added, taking a deep breath in.

"Why?" she was curious and she knew she wouldn't be able to hide it.

"She died… he trailed off, his voice quivered "….she was killed." Merlin said. A tremor ran throughout her body, his tone breathtaking.

Morgana understood what he was talking about. She had gone through that grief, had felt that suffering. She had lamented her sister and Mordred. She knew what it was like to have someone to care about and them being unjustly and wrongly snatched away.

"What happened?"

"She was a druid girl…you know how they were treated …Arthur killed her." He confessed. If only she knew how hard it was for him to utter those words.

She certainly didn't expect that answer.

"Pardon?" Her eyes narrowed.

Merlin didn't have the heart to say those words again. Saying them once were enough to break his heart. He thought he didn't need to repeat them; he was sure Morgana had heard them, loud and clear.

And she did, she just couldn't quite believe what she heard. She straightened her back.

Morgana managed to keep a straight face for about two seconds before she broke into hysterical and uncontrollable laughter.

"Why are you laughing?" He was hurt, she could see it, yet she couldn't stop laughing, she tried, she really did.

She shook her head. Gasping for air, she briefly wondered if this was one of those moments that Arthur had mentioned. She seriously doubted it.

"Arthur …killed….the woman you loved and yet…you still…" Morgana managed to speak and then Merlin interrupted her.

"I didn't love her. That is not what I said…"He snapped at her, realizing that he should not have told her that. However it was too late. He regretted confessing to her wholeheartedly.

"You said you were going to leave everything for her, did you not?" She countered, using his exact words against him.

"No…that was not…she was cursed…" He wished to have a chance to explain, but Morgana was having none of it, she cut him off.

"Of course she was cursed! She met you…" Morgana yelled. Her emotions out of control, she glared at him.

"How dare you?" he hissed, gritting his teeth. He stood up, feeling the urge to distance himself from her "Don't make this about you. She was nothing like you."

"She had magic and your king killed her. You could have stopped it…."

"I tried…" he yelled, his voice hard, they were both glaring daggers at each other.

"It's not just her, many druids, others with magic were killed…you let Arthur murder them…you just stood by as our kin were slaughtered…."

"It's not like that…"he retorted, making a fist; his hands shook uncontrollably.

"I tried…I really tried to do my best…" Frustrated, her words had hit a nerve and they both knew it. Merlin was crushed by them and Morgana saw that as an opportunity to carry on with her assault against his emotions, regret and guilt being the most evoked ones.

"Their blood is on your hands…my blood is on your hand." Complete silence followed her statement. His eyes widened, his bottom lip trembled. His jaw dropped. His face was drained off all color. That was the last blow. It felt like a sword had been driven through him. It was a total surprise to him his ability to remain on his feet, considering he felt like a feather in storm.

"You don't know what it was like….I never meant for any of that to happen to them…or to you" He added the last words in a whisper. His eyes were red with unshed tears. He took a step back. Morgana took as a chance she moved from her position and walked to him, stopping only a few feet away.

"Oh please…"she scoffed, rolling her eyes, unable to take his words seriously… "You could have saved them with a mere flick of your hand. You were just too much of a coward…ashamed of who you are…you chose to hide your gifts….you don't deserve them." She was in full mode, her anger had taken over her, memories of her begging him to ease her mind when she had thought she had magic, took control over her, his betrayal and disloyalty clutching her heart, poisoning her mind and her body. Literally.

"Uther executed so many innocent people under your watch."

He laughed, bitterly and forcefully.

"You're not so different from him then. After all, had you not done the same when you overthrew him?"

Her mouth opened and closed twice, Morgana searched for words to say; something to erase that smug smile he was giving her.

It took a while for her to fully realize that Merlin had in fact compared her to Uther. That cold hearted, blind, ignorant and tyrant king. That was unacceptable and unfair. She was nothing like him. What Merlin said finally made her snap and lose whatever amount of control she had left over her body. So she did the only thing she had been dying to do for the past five days she had been there.

At first she didn't realize what she had done, everything had happened so fast. One moment she was glowering at Merlin with utter disbelief and the next Merlin was flying backward, he hit the wall and fell on the ground. She hovered over him, he tried to stand up, he lifted his hand certainly to defend himself, but she said quickly.

"Careful what you might do next, I shall not be the only one you could hurt…"his eyes landed on her stomach, Merlin whimpered, his hand fell back on his side. He felt defeated, angry at her for what she was doing and the way she was using her state in her favor. She was right; he could do nothing, not when she looked like that.

Morgana smirked; she outstretched her hand and began to make a fist. Merlin felt his throat closing up; the air was hard for him to inhale. He wrapped his hands around his throat, gasping for air.

Morgana kneeled next to him; she leaned closer to him, staring as he struggled for breath. She thought that she would feel happy, relived, and triumphant to see him like that. But suddenly, she started to recall her own similar situation when she had been like him, on the ground, wheezing, dying. The tears in his eyes, the pain in them, and the regret….Her own tears formed and threatened to reflect her current weakness. Pushing away the memory of him, holding her in his arms, just before she was claimed by darkness and the fear of death, she clenched her fist harder, Merlin let out a silent scream.

"I trusted you. I confided in you…" she whispered to him and then unclenched her hand. Merlin fell to the floor, panting, catching his breath, his eyes fixed on Morgana.

She shook her head, standing up. Her eyes turned gold and Merlin was claimed by darkness.

She slowly stood up, her eyes fixed on him. She was breathing heavily, her hands shaking. She didn't know what to do. She looked around her.

She shook her head, mentally snapping herself back to reality. She stumbled backward, her eyes once again on Merlin. She had to leave before he woke up or someone would find him in such state.

She had to run away. She quickly fled her chamber.

She cleaned her face, wiping away any evidence of distress that the knights might see.

* * *

Merlin winced as he got off the ground. He gritted his teeth, inspecting his surroundings; Morgana was nowhere to be seen. Afraid that Morgana might have attempted something on Arthur's life, he started toward the door; his mind was set on finding Morgana before it was too late.

He heard someone calling and he recognized as Mordred's voice. He swallowed hard, composing himself quickly as Mordred walked toward him, his features reflecting his worry and Merlin prayed that nothing bad had happened.

"Have you seen Mother?" Mordred asked, "She said she would come see me after I finish speaking with Arthur."

Merlin shrugged, tried to appear ignorant to the knight, but the latter saw right through him.

"Have you two had another fight about Freya?"

* * *

Morgana managed to leave the city, she exited the castle's walls easily, and she had been walking for a while now, with no idea where she was heading.

She heard the sound of a carriage approaching.

She quickened her pace, hoping it wouldn't be someone she knew or someone who might cause her trouble. She didn't think she had the strength.

Her eyes widened when she saw the driver.

"Stop!" She yelled and walked quickly towards the carriage.

"Morgana, what are you doing here?"

"Hello, Freya! Where are you going?" Morgana asked, breathlessly.

Freya furrowed her brow. "Back to my house" she answered honestly.

Morgana sighed in relief, her eyes brightening up with hope.

"Very well." Morgana exclaimed, beaming. "I'm coming with you."

* * *

**_A/N_**:_ Sorry for the long wait. I had my first writer block for this fic and it's just affected my ability to write this chapter .This is the first part, the next one hopefully won't take long for me to finish. The good thing is that I have both chapter 7 and 8 written down ,__ unfortunately , I haven't typed them yet. _

_I realized I never thanked you guys for you wonderful support and the love you're showing for this fic. Thank you..._

_Reviews are very much appreciated and welcomed.. _


	6. Chapter 6

_**Obligatory disclaimer**_:Merlin and all associated creative properties belong to BBC. I don't claim any said property as my own, and I make no monetary profit from this fan-made story. All creative property not associated with said channel belong to me, and their use is limited to my express permission. Thank you.

_**THIS CHAPTER IS NOT EDITED. CONSIDER YOURSELF WARNED**_.

* * *

"Have you and mother had another dispute about Freya?" Mordred asked again; crossing his arms over his chest, his eyes meeting Merlin's.

The latter gulped, judging by the firm ton Mordred was using, Merlin assumed two things ; either the druid boy was very protective of Morgana, something he wouldn't dismiss considering the fact that he had addressed her as mother. Or that the subject of Freya was a delicate and a touchy matter; a matter that apparently was source of an argument between Merlin and Morgana.

Sighing and realizing that Mordred clearly had no idea of what had happened and furthermore, no knowledge of Morgana's possible whereabouts, Merlin shook his head, muttering a "No"

His voice was steady and calm. Hopefully Mordred would not sense any hints of Merlin's fib.

"I have been looking for her myself….you didn't happen to see her, have you?" Merlin asked quietly.

Mordred, clearly, believing what Merlin had said, uncrossed his arms, his features softening, yet his brow was still slightly wrinkled.

"Strange." He commented and tilted his head "I supposed that she would be already in my chamber after my briefing with the king."

Merlin nodded. "Yes, very strange." He lied, offering a small smile and added "Perhaps she is with Gaius…." The warlock suggested.

The suggestion was more of a diversion. Anxiety and worry had been building up ever since he ran out, looking for Morgana; if anything Merlin was eager to see if Arthur was fine.

"I will go see if she is there." Mordred said, turning around, obviously heading to Gaius' chamber. But he was stopped when a hand grabbed his wrist.

Mordred arched an eyebrow at Merlin. The latter pulled his hand quickly.

At that, the druid's boy frown deepened. Merlin quickly thought of something to explain the gesture.

"You look exhausted…why don't go rest…I'm sure we will see her by lunch." Merlin told him nervously, he averted his eyes away, looking anywhere but at Mordred.

Confused and overwhelmed with a felling of puzzlement, Merlin reflected upon the various conversations he had shared with the young knight before the war had started, they were never simple, never civil, not once had they spoken like two normal persons with common interest. Usually for them, accusation would be made; they would openly and frankly express their distrust and dislike for each other. They'd hiss or whisper in angry manner, trying not to gain the unwanted and prying eyes of Arthur or the rest of the knights. Though the hate was there in their glares, in their words, fairly evident.

Mordred was tempted to accept the offer, he was tired, exhausted and Merlin had reckoned so, from the druid boy's posture, his slumped shoulders and his pale and slightly dirty skin. Merlin was surprised that it had taken him awhile to come to that obvious conclusion. Yet before Mordred got a chance to reply, a high pitched, though annoying, voice called from behind him, causing Mordred to turn around to meet its owner. The need to follow Mordred's actions was unnecessary and fairly pointless. Merlin believed so, for he would easily recognize that voice .It was Arthur's. However remembering how concerned he'd been moments before to check on the king's wellbeing, his blue worried eyes quickly looked over Mordred's shoulder, landing on said king.

He took in the king's state, instantly. His eyes were flickering up and down, checking very inch of his armor, looking for any signs of blood. There was no palpable indication that would imply that Morgana might have caused any trouble, seeing that the king didn't look alerted or injured.

Merlin finally allowed himself to breathe out in relief.

"Merlin…"Arthur said, once he reached them two. "I have been looking all over for you, as my court…" He trailed off as Mordred backed away, making a half turn.

"Perhaps you are right. I would not have another chance to rest." He peered up, to look at Arthur.

"I have training tomorrow morning." He continued mostly to Arthur, as if asking for his permission.

"Very well." Arthur said, nodding his head. "Until later"

Mordred glanced over at Merlin "Father."

Then at Arthur. "My lord." He gave Arthur a slight courtesy, before turning around leaving the two of them alone.

The two men remained silent; watching as the knight steadily retreated.

His eyes were fixed, almost glued to Mordred's back. As he watched him walk away, Merlin found himself ,rather unable to gaze away even after druid boy rounded a corner, eventually disappearing from his line of vision.

Arthur let a forlorn sigh and shook his head.

"No matter what …I will never understand him." He commented.

The king's utterance was met with complete silence. The court sorcerer wasn't paying attention to what his friend was saying, not that he was ingoing him, it was just that he was replaying over and over what Mordred had said, in his mind.

He assumed for a mere a second that he somehow, had misheard what the druid boy had uttered. But no, no mistake was made and Merlin had really heard the word loud and clear. Few hours before, he called Morgana Mother and now he called him father.

There were his parents?

Just when he thought that he wouldn't get any more unexpected surprises.

_What was going on? Wasn't enough that he had to pretend that he was married to Morgana? But having Mordred addressing him as his father; wasn't something that Merlin had predicted. _

Seeing the blank look on Merlin face, Arthur cleared his throat. He narrowed his eyes.

"Merlin." He called out, nudging his shoulder. That seemed to be affective as Merlin shook his head, a dumb expression washing over his features.

"Uhm…what?" He looked up, his face reflecting his disbelieve and astonishment. "Have you said something?"

Arthur huffed, "what's the matter now, Merlin?"

"Nothing" The warlock said quickly, too quickly and that only served to confirm Arthur's assumption that Merlin was withholding something from him.

"Off with it Merlin." Arthur crossed his arms as he waited for Merlin's reply.

Numerous thoughts seemed to jump all over his mind which he unreservedly wished to have their answers and finally discover some truths about this reality. However, surprisingly, from all the things he wanted to know, only one thought, truly seemed to gain his interest. It had Merlin even more curious, so he rushed to verbalize it.

"Am I not too young to be his father?"

Arthur stopped dead in his tacks, wide-eyed and lips apart, he stared at his court sorcerer.

The silence became awkward, as neither of them offered to put an end to it.

But then Arthur laughed. Merlin gaped at him.

First Morgana, now Arthur.

He wasn't exactly telling jokes, so the laughter was relatively inexplicable.

Possibly, it was family trait. He supposed, scoffing.

Moments later, Arthur calmed a bit. He placed a hand on Merlin's shoulder. They started their walk down the empty corridor.

"Do not tell me that you only realized how odd the whole matter with Mordred just now?"

For lack of a proper response, Merlin shrugged, not saying anything.

Arthur snorted. "How do you think I felt when I first heard him address you and Morgana as his parents?"

"You panicked?" Merlin taunted, smirking.

"That's an understatement. You act as if you didn't know what really happened that day .You were there, Merlin. I bloody fainted."

Merlin chuckled causing Arthur to narrow his eyes; he didn't appear to be amused.

Merlin suppressed his laughter. Just like Arthur had said, the warlock wasn't ignorance to that day's events, so he needed to hide his surprise.

"I'm sorry Arthur." The king didn't seem to believe his friend's request for forgiveness.

"Don't apologize unless you truly mean it, Merlin." He nudged Merlin on the back.

Due to the hard and fierce blow Merlin had received form Morgana during the morning; his back was still sore and aching. Merlin reacted to the hit he'd just got from Arthur. He winced and moved out of the king's reach.

Arthur scowled at that. "Are you alright?"

Merlin paused. His mind was churning through many possible responses.

Unfortunately, none of them were convincing. He could tell Arthur that he was still suffering the aftermaths of the hit he'd gotten from Morgana when he'd waken up the first time. However it was a poor excuse considering the incident had happened five days ago besides Gaius had inspected his injuries and had given him a treatment for them.

All and all, Merlin came to the conclusion that he had nothing to respond with except…well the truth which he cannot share with Arthur.

Eventually Merlin started to hum. His hands began to sweat. He usually had all sort of answers for Arthur, to explain anything. But standing there, his mouth opening and closing, no words were spoken, Merlin felt utterly speechless. He thought that with Arthur knowing about his magic, the time of lies and deception was far behind him. But apparently it wasn't the case.

It made his heart cringe.

Luckily for him, Merlin didn't have to say anything, for Arthur ended his misery with a soft chuckle.

"Morgana, huh?" His head snapped up, his eyes meeting Arthur's.

"What makes you think it's Morgana?" He inquired.

"Because I have been there, when Gwen with child, I mean." Arthur explained his voice genuinely caring.

"I seriously doubt it, Arthur" Merlin commented, continuing his walking. Arthur soon caught up.

"Merlin, wait." Arthur called out. Once he reached Merlin, he grabbed his arm, preventing him from walking away again.

"If I tell you something promise me you won't laugh." Arthur said, his expression turned serious. A rare thing Merlin had witnessed only during severe matters like the knights meetings or wars.

So Merlin nodded instantly.

"You're back hurt, does it not?" to that question, Merlin nodded once more.

"When Gwen was six months along…." he trailed off scowling. "Well to be more accurate, ever since she reached her six months of pregnancy and up until Edward was born, I had spent few nights sleeping in a chair. Some nights she'd toss and turn for the better part of the night…it was hard to get any sleep, so I slept in a chair and in the morning, I would be suffering for back pain."

"You think…"Merlin started carefully, trying to interrupt the king's words correctly. "My back aches because I slept on a chair..."

Arthur shrugged "Or on the floor." He added nonchalantly.

"Because of Gwen's tossing and turning, I'd sleep on the floor?" Merlin arched his eyebrow, looking at Arthur with bewilderment.

"What does Gwen have to do with any of this?" the king frowned, puzzled by Merlin's utterance.

"You just mentioned her name." The warlock argued.

Arthur opened his mouth, closed it then snapped. "I was giving you an example to relate to your situation.

"What situation?" Merlin asked.

"With Morgana." Arthur yelled, frustrated.

_Now they were talking about Morgana again._

Had Arthur heard or seen anything that might got him suspicious.

"Then why did you say Gwen, if you meant Morgana?" Getting more confused, Merlin wondered.

"Oh my goodness." Arthur breathed out. His eyes were wide; he made a whole turn in front of Merlin. When he stopped he looked at him with parted lips.

"What did I say?" Merlin asked. Rather taken aback by Arthur.

"I…" Arthur paused, finding himself at loss of words which was unusual for him. "You could be fairly stupid, Merlin. Are you aware of that?"

"I honestly don't understand your approaches."

Arthur growled "I'm trying to offer you an advice here, Merlin…"

The latter, even though he had no clue what Arthur was babbling about, decided to humor him.

"Alright, tell me."

"Let's go somewhere more private." Arthur said and Merlin -like the good servant he once had been, followed silently.

* * *

Morgana had forgotten how it felt to be scared of, feared. It was a very pleasant and delightful feeling that she welcomed it wholly.

A feeling that had accompanied her as she ordered her bandits around or as she was spotted and recognized. Lady Morgana, the last priestess of the old religions. It had a ring; one that brought horror.

And for the past week, since she had woken up back in Camelot, fear was no more. She wasn't treated with fear but …with respect. She despised that. Because it only served to remind her of her years before Morgause took care of her.

But now, sitting next to Freya, the feeling had returned and Morgana couldn't hide her amusement, even if she tried.

Freya didn't argue much with Morgana after she'd declared that she intended on going back to her house.

Even if she had done so, Morgana reasoned, if Freya had refused to comply; both of them where far away from the gates of castle, and being heavy with a child wouldn't have been much of a problem, Morgana assumed that she could have easily got rid of Freya and put her hands on her carriage.

Luckily for the druid girl, it wasn't her time and she got to live for another day.

Freya had asked why Morgana had wanted to go with her and the lady had merely answered that she'd needed to change of scenery and Merlin was alright with that.

Morgana was still uncertain as to what she'd do once she was far enough from Camelot. But she was going to look for Morgause, that was her primary thought. None of those history books she'd read mentioned her sister's whereabouts or even fate.

Morgana was settled on finding out whichever.

Freya kept on steeling few glances at Morgana very now and then which irritated the lady of Camelot.

The silence was too heavy to bear and the ride was very boring. Morgana felt tired, the magical outburst she'd launched against Merlin finally started to take its toll on her. Her eyelids were heavy. Yet she continued to fight the need to drift into sleep. She couldn't risk it.

Air ruffled around her face was soft and a bit chilly which was no help to her because it only caused her body to enjoy the weather and begin to relax.

"How far are we from your house?" Morgana asked. Starting a conversation could at least take her mind of how tired she was.

"It's a day ride; Morgana. We won't reach the house until sundown." Freya answered.

"What?" Morgana exclaimed. She glanced down at her belly and suppressed a cry of frustration. If she wasn't with a child, such ride would not have been much of a problem to her.

But now, as if she wasn't tired enough, the entire ride could drain her magic completely. And she needed it, badly.

_Could this day get any worse?_

"I can take you back to Camelot, if you wish."

"NO!" she yelled, Freya moved away from Morgana, frowning.

"I apologize...I should not have…"Morgana started but was cut off when a patrol of Camelot's knights appeared before them.

As if she got an answer to her question. Her day just got a lot worse.

The group of knights approached them.

"Lady Morgana, Freya." One of the knight, she didn't really remember his name yet she recalled seeing him around the castle, greeted. So Freya was known to this knight. She noted.

"Is there a reason for you to obstruct our ride?" Morgana asked, her voice cold.

The knight didn't seem to be affect by her tone. He even decided to ignore her question.

_How dare he?_

"May I ask where you heading to?"

She was going to say that it was none of his business, but Freya stated first.

"My house. The lady Morgana shall be my guest."

The same knight, clearly the leader of the patrol, jumped off his horse.

"I'm afraid I cannot allow that." He said, he stood next to the carriage. He held out his hand for Morgana to take, but she ignored him and instead focused on what he said.

"What do you mean you cannot allow it?"

_Did he know who she was? _

The knight was as stubborn as Morgana, he didn't seem to be offended by what she did and continued to hold out his hand. Freya was already out of the carriage.

"A hunter had been attracted today by bandits. We are still looking for them."

Morgana raised an eyebrow. "And you assume that I will cancel my visit simply because you are incompetent to do your duty?"

"No such thing milady. You do not need to cancel it, only postpone it. I'm sure Freya, won't mind. It is after all for your own safely." He finally let his hand fall by his side.

Morgana snort. "I'm quite capable of protecting myself; I don't need your help." She smirked, widely at him.

Her statement was met with confusion, as all eyes were on her stomach.

She rolled her eyes. She gritted her teeth. She gave in

"We will be going back to Camelot, I presume."

The knight, who she really needed to know his name, nodded his hand. He, once again offered his hand and this time Morgana took it, compulsorily.

Once she was on the ground. She turned to Freya glaring at her. She looked around counting the knights.

There were so many of them, she wasn't certain if she could take them all down. Freya wasn't much of a problem.

But then she realized something.

"I can't ride a horse. I am with a child." That remark was quite useless as if she could conceal the bulge of a stomach.

_Alright, so she still had a chance of not returning back to Camelot. _

Much to her dismay, another knight cut in. "We can borrow the carriage if it is alright with you. We'll offer you a horse if you wish to leave for your house." that was meant to Freya. Morgana turned around, glowering at said woman. Who looked briefly between Morgana the two knights and then back to Morgana. She took a step back.

"Of course, I do not mind. Anything to provide you the comfort you need, Morgana."

Freya said .Her voice cheerful and relieved.

"That's absurd." Morgana said. If she was going back to that Castle, she would not go easily.

"You cannot possibly, let an armless young woman roam the forest on her own. "

The knights shared a look between them.

In the end, moments later after much discussing, Morgana found herself sitting once again in the carriage, with the rude and obnoxious knight next to her.

The latter had offered Freya his horse, and she along with another knight, were heading to her house. He'd offered her en escort as solution to the trouble Morgana had voiced.

They still hadn't started moving yet. The reins were out of the reach, but the man outstretched his hand, muttered something and the reins flew to his hands.

It took all her remaining energy not to gape at him and display her astonishment.

_A knight with magic. Remarkable. How things were different here._

The journey back to Camelot began and the silence was far too awkward.

"You know Freya?" Morgana asked, causally.

The knight hummed in response.

"You fancy her?" the man had given her no indication that he might but there was a lot of time to waste.

He scowled. "I'm married."

"That was not my question" She argued, smiling innocently.

"I knew her when we were little." He finally replied.

So he was druid as well.

More awkward silence.

"Do you have kids?" Morgana asked again. She could tell that he was annoyed with her so she decided to continue doing that.

"Yes." He answered again.

"Shame." The lady commented, shaking her head.

The knight frowned at that. He glanced toward her. "Why?"

She shrugged. "If I wasn't exhausted I wouldn't have hesitated to snap your neck."

He'd ruined her plan, he must pay for it. But perhaps another day.

The remaining of the ride was silent was Morgana was thrilled for that.

* * *

The definition of a private place, according to Arthur, Merlin thought, was flawed.

As he followed his king to the place where he assumed the two of them could speak more freely and…well privately, Merlin came to the conclusion that he might need to set the king straight.

Once inside Merlin glanced at Arthur.

"How could this possibly be private?" The smell of reeking mead, hit him as he started to look for vacant table.

They were in the tavern.

Arthur laughed. "No one will be interested in eavesdropping on our conversation if they are too drunk."

"It is the middle of the day, Arthur. Nobody is drunk!" Merlin exclaimed, few heads turned in his direction.

"Everybody here is drunk." A voice called from behind. They both turned and came face to face with Gwaine.

Merlin and Arthur held both the same expression as they frowned at him.

"When did you come here?" Merlin asked.

"I never left." Gwaine all but yelled, soon he started to laugh. "Now come." He ushered them toward his table.

Merlin refrained from drinking. Not looking forward to repeating the events of the day when he'd offered Morgana a chance to kill him.

Instead he watched as Arthur and Gwaine enjoyed their drinks.

Gwaine soon fell asleep and only then did Arthur and Merlin finally got a chance to have their private conversation.

As Arthur had said earlier, he wanted to offer Merlin a piece of advice. About what exactly?

Merlin had absolutely no idea, until now.

Apparently, Arthur wanted to give Merlin a talk about how to handle women how happened to be expecting. The main subject was of course none than Morgana.

Between drinks, Arthur educated Merlin on how to ovoid certain situations.

He was after all speaking out of experience. Throughout the conversation , Merlin became obsessed with a single idea, well it was more of a interpretation of what Arthur had shared with him. Morgana might not be with a child.

What brought that shocking idea was the things Arthur mentioned how Gwen had experienced uncomfortable states during the last few months of her pregnancy and how those circumstances had affected the king firsthand.

Some of the discomfort Arthur had brought up were the backache, the constant need to urinate, the complains and the carvings and some much more.

Yet, not once, had he heard Morgana voice out her distress and uneasiness.

Not once, had she complained of lack of sleep because the child inside her prevented her from getting any rest due to their constant moving and kicking.

She did appear to be tired most of time but he simply believed that that was due to the extra weight she'd been carrying around.

She never woke him up in the middle of the night because she craved any type of food or drinks.

A lot of things didn't match what Arthur told him, so it was rather logical for Merlin to deduce such disturbing thought despite how ridiculous it was.

The conversation carried out smoothly, with Arthur speaking and sipping his mead, and Merlin listening, not bothering to interrupt, too absorbed by their chat.

Things turned rather radically and soon confusion became embarrassment when Gwaine joined their amicable exchange.

While Arthur mostly focused on the cons of being father-to-be, Gwaine had another thought in mind as he began to state its pros.

He actually concentrated on one single thing. Shagging.

And how lucky Merlin was because apparently women expecting develop an open…As mental image slowly began to creep in his mind.

Merlin swallowed hard. Glancing at his two companions, noticing the disturbing smug smirk Gwaine was flashing him and the dreamy look on Arthur's face as if he was recalling some good memories, Merlin wished he could just flee that place. At the end, he peeped around, spotting an abandoned goblet on the table behind the drunken knight, he used his magic and the cup flew and smashed against the back of Gwaine's head.

As a result the embarrassing chitchat was over.

Merlin and Arthur contempt whether they should take Gwaine back to his room or just leave him there.

After they took the knight back to his room, the king and his former servant parted.

Finally Merlin decided he should go seek Morgana, after he found her chamber empty.

He was descending the stairs when he spotted her in the middle of the square making her way toward him.

He opened his mouth to question her about her whereabouts, but she cut him off.

"I'm tired. Let's talk later." It was something in the way she talked that told him that she wasn't asking but actually informing him and that there was no room for discussion.

* * *

Shortly after her afternoon nap, Morgana left her chamber. Being careful not to be spotted by Merlin or Mordred, she made her way to Gaius' chamber.

The old physician glanced up at the sound of his door opening, observing as the lady Morgana entered.

"Morgana?" He frowned "Merlin said that you were tired and that you were to…"

Morgana licked her bottom lip "I was tired, but now I am quite alright"

"Very well, if you are looking for Merlin…"He paused as Morgana shook her head.

"Then why are you here? You seek something?" He asked, with concern.

"Yes." She said. She closed the door behind her, walking over to Gaius.

"I came to see if you were able to obtain the books I asked you for…"

"Ah! Yes. I was very fortunate to find them in such short notice. They weren't an easy thing to locate. Rare and very…"

Morgana chimed in, growing tired of his unproductive babbling. The sooner she got the books, the sooner she'd leave him to his devices.

She truly believed that his work or science as he claimed was a complete waste of time and space.

This man surrounded himself with herbs, books and different items that related to his passion and occupy; in the sole reason to heal and provide remedies for the sick ones. Yet most of the illnesses that he treated could easily be cured, once and for all, with a couple of easily preformed spells.

It irritated her to a great extent, that in spite the fact that he had magic, which had been a quite shock to Morgana that she had almost snapped that man's neck, Gaius remained loyal to the methods he'd used during the reign of both Uther and Arthur, even here after the restoration of magic back to Camelot, he continued to avoid the use of it.

"Yes. I'm well aware of their nature Gaius. And I required them specifically for that reason"

Gaius merely nodded his head. "They are in the other room; make yourself comfortable while I fetch them out for you."

Morgana politely declined the offer and instead she glanced around her. Her eyes flickering through the room, gazing at the numerous shelves filled with books and ingredients. Each of them produced a particular odor, that when all of them were mixed together, they emitted a smell that sickened her and had her yearning to run out of there. If only she could .She thought, sadly.

But maybe she was just overreacting and exaggerating a bit, the smell wasn't that powerful, maybe it was actually the chamber or even the whole damned castle that had feeling this way.

One thing for sure, she was fairly certain of that she didn't want to remain in that forsaken place, not another day. She was determinant to establish that no matter what.

Gaius reappeared from what used to be Merlin's room, holding many books between his hands.

Morgana observed him, not bothering to offer to help, as he disposed of them on the table nearby. He caught his breath afterwards.

Morgana ignored that and reached out her hand toward one of the books but she stopped midair when Gaius stepped between her and the table.

"May I ask why you need them?"

"No" she replied fiercely.

Gaius didn't seem like the type of men who'd take no for an answer.

"They contain powerful magic…dark magic." He insisted on the word dark.

Morgana titled her head to the side. "I am fairly aware of that Gaius. I …"

She was going to remind him of what she had said before he'd disappeared inside Merlin old chamber, that she asked for them due to that particular thing. But the old physician interrupted her.

"Then I'm sure, you would understand that I need to know why you asked me to seek them out for you." He stopped, letting his words sink in then added quietly. "I'm merely worried; if there is anything I can help you with ...you can tell me."

_Worried. That was surprising._

"How thoughtful of you, Gaius." Morgana said, her tone laced with mockery.

"But you were not much of a help when I came to you after waking up, panting and terrified because of my nightmares."

"I made you sleeping droughts, to ease them." He reasoned, not liking her tone.

"The truth would have been more appreciated." She retorted, her voice started to rise. "I was no longer a child, you could have told me the truth instead of the lies and excuses to you continued to feed me night after night."

"And what did you suppose I should have told you?" Gaius said, strangely the old man stayed calm.

_Was he bloody deaf?_

"The truth," Morgana yelled, angry. The indifference Gaius was showing regarding her outburst served only to enrage her more.

"The truth?" He echoed, his eyebrow rising even higher. "How would you have reacted to it? Knowing that your nightmares are in reality visions….something related to magic." He clarified. He sought a chair and sat on it. His eyes, not once averting from her.

Morgana glared, her hands in fists.

"That would have been my own predicament to solve…"

"On the contrary dear…"Gaius shook his head. He was quite for few moments. "Perhaps it was long since it happened, but you cannot deny that you were not scared the first time you discovered you had magic."

Morgana swallowed the lump that formed in her throat.

If she were to be honest with herself, the word scared was understatement to describe how truly she had felt that night.

_Terrified, petrified, horror-struck, scared stiff_….she could go on and on.

Merlin, maybe had failed to ease her mind, but what he'd done afterwards, directing her toward to druids and keeping her secret, she was grateful for him. That feeling had lasted until he'd handed her the poisoned water.

"Alright." She breathed in, her eyes looked around until they came across a chair, far enough from Gaius. "I understand why you didn't tell me when I was young but when I was old enough, I had ever right to be told." Her voice quivered when she uttered the last words.

Gaius' lips switched, threatening a frown. "I was an old fool man, then."

"You're still old." Morgana remarked absently.

Gaius gave a small smile which Morgana knew was stale.

"Not all seers possess magic powers and I hoped you'd be one of them."

Anger started filling her and Morgana was about to protest but Gaius held out his hand, silencing her. He wanted her to let him finish speaking. Morgana slapped her mouth shut; she allowed him his unspoken wish.

"That was rather a poor excuse for not telling you." He paused.

Morgana kept her eyes on him. The emotions that washed over his features made him look, if possible, older.

Regret, that was what his eyes flashed with.

"When I first told Merlin about your abilities, that you might have magic…" That prompted her interest; she leaned forward in her chair.

"He wanted to go rushing in your chamber to tell you…" he said.

"You told him not to." Morgana reasoned it was obvious; Gaius refusing to look her in the eyes was dead giveaway.

He nodded. "We made…I made the mistake of believing kilgharrah."

"Believing kilgharrah?" She muttered under her breath, Gaius gave no indication that he heard her.

"That dragon helped with a lot of matters, was right about a lot of things…but when it came to you and Mordred he was wrong."

Now things became far more interesting. Mordred was somehow involved. And there was another dragon other than Aithusa…

"How wrong was he?" Morgana dared to ask. Not certain if she should wonder about it, in case the question could initiate some suspicion within the old physician.

"Very wrong, my dear." He chuckled. His laugh was bitter. "He thought that you and Mordred would form an alliance and together, you'd be the reason for Camelot's downfall, its bane." His amusement died almost instantly after he said that.

Her eyes widened. Her mouth was ajar. Gaius seemed oblivious to impact his words had on Morgana for he continued to speak.

"He told Merlin that Mordred was going to grow up to kill Arthur. Unbelievable, is it not?"

She didn't trust her voice, Morgana nodded firmly.

"How long…." Her throat was dry. "When Merlin did first hear about ….it?" she stuttered.

Gaius frowned as if attempted to recall the memory. His face broke into a grin that made her heart skip a beat with anticipation.

"When you two hid Mordred, in you chamber." Gaius answered his grin still intact.

Her blood ran cold. Morgana felt dizzy. Gaius words ringing inside her mind.

Was that why he poisoned her? Why he tried to kill her?

But if that was true then why did he tell Morgause the type of poison he'd used.

Or Mordred? If he'd known how things would turned out to be , why did he help him escape?

Why did Merlin let him live knowing what he'd do? Waiting until the inevitable happened for him to take some action seemed utterly puzzling to Morgana.

When she first heard that Emrys was her doom, she tried everything to find him, to kill him.

But sitting there, pondering Gaius' words, Morgana was overwhelmed with bewilderment.

As she continued that line of thinking, wondering, her mind recalling every encounter she'd had with Merlin or Emrys. He'd always let her go. Morgana grew more and more lightheaded. She held tight to the chair, her knuckles turned white.

Perhaps she better discuss this information with Merlin. He could either confirm or refute what she just learned.

"Morgana, are you alright?" She faintly heard Gaius ask. She needed to get a grip, take hold of herself. She took a couple of short breaths. Her eyes peered up toward Gaius' concerned face.

"I …water…need water…" she managed to say, her voice gruff and shaky.

Gaius quickly complied with her request. Morgana hold the goblet between her trembling hands, few drops fell on her dress. She didn't care.

She took a few slips, letting the cold liquid slid down her throat. It didn't expunge entirely the unsettling felling that gripped her heart but it alleviated it enough for her to stand without losing her balance.

"I must leave." She hurried toward the door, stumbling.

"Morgana?" Gaius called, and Morgana was half tempted to ignore him. She turned.

"Your books." He said, gesturing toward the table. Realizing that she almost left without them, she blinked. She'd momentary forgotten why she'd came there in the first place.

"Thank you." she blurred out and left.

* * *

She had wished to rest and Merlin had granted her wish and didn't disturb her for the rest of the day. It was almost nightfall when he decided to head back to her chamber. Not knowing if she was still asleep but he assumed he should check up on her, either way. It had been awhile since she had returned from her unsuccessful attempt at escaping Camelot.

A topic they needed to discuss urgently.

He didn't knock like he usually did before entering, this time he simply pushed the door open. He stood still by the threshold as his eyes landed on her.

She was awake. He mentally noted.

She was sitting by the table, it was covered by books. She looked up for a brief moment. Seeing who had just entered the room, she deadpanned and then she glanced down, resuming her reading.

Merlin frowned at that. He really didn't expect that from her. He thought that at the sight of him she would shout at him or throw him once more against the wall. A habit she'd became accustom to, he presumed.

Yet the silent treatment wasn't what he awaited from her. He closed the door with a little force, wishing that she might abandon her book and look at him properly.

Moments past, as he stood by the door, staring at her and waiting for her to once more acknowledge his presence.

But she didn't.

"Good evening, Morgana" He greeted. His voice was light, almost cheerful if it wasn't for the anger he started to feel.

He stepped further into the room. She still hadn't look up at him yet.

"Morgana…" He called out, softly and took another step forward. She still ignored him.

Merlin bit his bottom lip, he sighed then he asked.

"What are you doing?" A stupid question and he knew it. He almost rolled his eyes.

He leaned forward, trying to figure out what she was reading. His eyes roamed through the various books and parchments placed in front of her. They all were open, they appeared to be old.

Her head shut up suddenly, Merlin jerked back. Surprised by the sudden movement.

He placed a hand on his chest.

"You startled me." He commented, taking sharp breaths to calm himself.

She quirked an eyebrow, finding his action annoying.

Her lips were pressed into a thin line before she added.

"Pardon me, Merlin." She snorted, shaking her head "I believe it is rather obvious what I am doing." She told him and looked back down.

"You're still mad." Nodding his head, he stated and backed away from her and sat on a chair across from her. He crossed his arms and leaned fully back.

"No" she replied coolly. "Why would you assume such matter?" She told him, her voice thick with sarcasm and it irritated him.

Morgana fixed him with a look, her eyes flashing with disgust.

He had enough of her provoking behavior.

She wasn't the only one who was angry with what had taken place that morning. She'd thrown him against a wall because he'd told the truth.

He too had the right the express his anger, but at least he had the decency to do so in proper manner.

Swiftly, he reached out his hand, snatching the book from under hers.

"Can we speak about what happened?" Merlin asked politely.

Morgana glared at him. They both stood up, moving away from the table. Cautiously, they observed each other. As if they both expected the possibility of yet another fight…which by Morgana's expression, Merlin considered ,it was best to determine a quick, yet harmless approach that might not cause any potential injury or pain toward the child.

Although, Morgana had another thought in mind she tried to regain the book from Merlin. Unfortunately for her, due to her current state, she was slow so it gave Merlin the time to move out of her reach.

Merlin smirked and Morgana growled, rolling her eyes. She was half tempted to redo what had accrued that morning, yet she thought otherwise.

Merlin appeared to be prepared to whatever she might threw his way.

"I only want to speak…."He trailed off, she shook her head.

"And I am trying to find a solution to our delicate predicament. So what happen today will not take place again."

He squinted in confusion. There were many predicaments that they'd been facing; he didn't know which one she meant.

"What predicament?"

"This." She snapped. Her hands were gesturing to her surroundings.

His frown only deepened and Morgana huffed and threw her hands up in the air -a sign of her frustration and irritation at his inability to understand what she was referring to.

"I am going to undo whatever brought us here…" she sighed "I need to find a spell or…" she hands rambled through the various books, emphasizing her meaning.

Merlin stared at her, wide-eyed and lips apart.

_Was she really saying what he had just heard her say? _

Morgana took his state of bewilderment as her chance, she walked to him, and her hand reached out and got a hold of the book.

It was weak attempt since Merlin had an iron-grip on it and no matter how many times Morgana pulled, she couldn't free it.

The whole situation began to anger her.

"Why?" If she wasn't standing this close to him she was certain that she would not have heard him. His voice was a whisper, barely audible.

"Why not?" she retorted, his grip loosened and Morgana grabbed the book and returned to the table.

His mouth opened and closed twice and he blinked.

"You died Morgana. You are dead" He stated, once he regained his voice back "why would you wish to come back to that?"

He ran a hand through his hair. She was dead; she didn't have _anythin_g to go back to.

At the mention of her death, Morgana flinched slightly and it didn't go unnoticed by Merlin. She cleared her throat. Her eyes were downward. Her head rose slowly.

"So is Arthur." Her voice was low yet cold.

It was his turn to flinch. He had to look away from her and swallow the lump in his throat.

"I know it is something very odd, this whole situation." He began, hesitantly. "You and I married and …."

Morgana didn't let him finish, she cut him off.

"This is not about that…" Morgana refuted, scowling. Merlin raised an eyebrow.

She rolled her eyes. "Alright, fine. However, it is only a part of the problem. You are oblivious to the real matter here."

"Which is?" He inquired, promoting her to explain more.

The highest priestess took a deep breath. Words appeared unable to properly explain what she was speaking off. So she sought another approach.

Morgana stood up, she gave him a glance before she turned around, heading toward the bed. Merlin assumed that she decided not reply to his question. He continued to watch her wordlessly, waiting for her to say something. She sat on the edge of the bed, it wouldn't be all that weird, except she was staring at him like he had sprouted a second head.

Was she ignoring him again? He really started to get bored of that.

"What?" She motioned for him to come closer, and he did so. Taking his hands in hers, Morgana placed them on her bulge of a stomach and let them rest. Nothing happened, though. His mind recalled the conversation he'd had with Arthur and Gwaine earlier that morning. His throat became dry. He refused to meet her eyes. Slightly panicked, even afraid of what he might see in them.

_That_ would never happen.

Was that what she meant when she'd said that being married was only part of the problem?

Was she having- how did Gwaine phrase it – sudden desires and urges.

He didn't know how he should be feeling.

"Morgana…" he said softly…He started moving his hands off her, but fingers grasped his and pull them back down to her stomach once more. That was very weird, scary even.

And then he felt it.

"Oh my…!" Merlin exclaimed and he felt her fingers curl tighter around his. "That was…I mean…"

Morgana nodded, blinking twice.

"It's kicking." Merlin laughed, an eerie feelings washed over him.

Relief washed over him. The corners of his lips curved upward.

_How awkward and odd would it have been if Morgana truly wanted….He shook his head, pushing that uncomfortable thought to the back of his mind?_

"How long have that been happening?"

"Since the first day." she replied honestly. "But I brushed it off at the time…I had a lot on my mind back then."

Merlin breathed out a laugh. She was right.

"Do you understand what I mean now?" Morgana asked, her features had softened and there was a hint of hope in her tone.

With both of his hands still resting on her stomach, his eyes flickered up.

Sheepishly, he shook his head. "No." He muttered.

Morgana's eyes doubled in size, both eyebrows shot up, almost reaching the hairline.

"Merlin…"she snarled, her eyes regarding him with infuriation.

Trying to feeling the child kick again, Merlin started to poke her side, gently. He was too occupied that he failed to catch on her calling his name.

"Alright, stop that." Morgana slapped his hands away. Merlin looked up, sad and with a pout on his face.

"Why did…" His protest was cut off instantaneously.

"Merlin, you are an idiot." She commented, emphasizing the word idiot.

He should have been offended by her insult. Nonetheless he wasn't. After hearing Arthur calling him as such over the years, Merlin truly believed that he had become immune to it. So he continued to stare at her dumbly. She glared menacingly at him and Merlin let a nervous smile grace his features.

"I am with child" she hissed…breathing in a deep breath to calm her soon to be raging feelings.

His eyes were still fixed on hers, gazing at her with utter confusion. She was stating the obvious…

It wasn't like her swollen belly could be overlooked, even if he wanted to.

"Bloody hell" Morgana snapped and grabbed his hand again and put it on her abdomen.

"In less than three months…"she trailed off, her voice caught up in her throat, leaving her speechless.

She clasped a hand over her mouth, she closed her eyes.

She soon recovered from her brief and bizarre moment.

"Please tell me you understand what I'm trying to tell you….please" she all but pleaded. Which was rather odd, Merlin thought.

He forgot the last time Morgana was this desperate. She was almost hurt. Yet again, he shoved those thoughts away, because just like the time before, the child kicked and Merlin grinned like a fool.

"He is kicking." He didn't ask her about the pronoun, but just turned his attention back to the stomach and the fact _there's a living, kicking child in there_.

With that thought in mind, he froze.

_Less than three months _that was she'd said…._a living child_…._his child_…_his and Morgana's child._

"Oh!" He breathed out; his eyes flickered up, locking gaze with hers. It finally sank in what she had been trying to tell him. The realization hit hard, almost like slap to the face.

He had been so absorbed by the fact that Arthur was alive, that Albion was real. He had been caught up by everything that had been happening for the past week that he somehow, overlooked something highly and crucially important. Something that been staring at him in the face, from the very moment he had gotten there.

He looked up, closing his eyes briefly and then he glanced down.

Realizing where his hand was, Merlin pulled it quickly.

"What are we going to do?" he asked his voice gruff.

"I honestly do not know Merlin." Morgana confessed, tensing.

He felt hot all of the sudden, he felt like he was suffocating. And this time it was not Morgana's doing.

"I need some air." He blurred out and jumped to his feet. He only took one step forward when he felt Morgana placed her hand on his forearm. He turned to face her.

"You are not leaving to any other place until we come to dissolve this matter." She paused "Together" she added.

He should have said no. Should have left, to get some time to think this whole thing through and perhaps find a solution but he took a look at her eyes, they were pleading with him to stay.

So, he reluctantly, sat back on the mattress next her.

Nodding his head, he said. "Alright"

Morgana offered an honest and a genuine smile which Merlin instantly returned and regarded as she stood up.

"We shall divide these books; try to see if there is any similar situation such ours…"

"What?" Merlin yelled and stood up too. "You still wish to go leave this place?"

Morgana furrowed her brow "yes .That is the idea."

Surprised, Merlin gaped at her, he blinked twice.

"When you said we will try to solve the situation, I presumed that we were going to discus well" …he trailed off, gesturing to her swollen stomach "you know"

Morgana snickered, shaking her head slowly.

"There is nothing in those books that is capable on ending this pregnancy. Moreover ending it when I am this far along is rather dangerous and risky."

He wasn't sure if he should be relieved that she wasn't planning on losing the child or shocked that her knowledge and awareness of possible risks were only a clear indication that she had obviously considered that idea.

Seeing the doubtful yet horrified look she was receiving from Merlin, Morgana took in a deep breath.

"I fear that we have misunderstood each other."

"We have?" Merlin asked, carefully.

Morgana only nodded, she closed her eyes, glancing at the ceiling before she met his eyes.

"Dinner would be served shortly. I'm famished."

Gaping at her, he watched as she quietly left the room.

* * *

_**A/N**_: I apologize for the lack of update during the last month.

Reading some of the works of my fellow authors in FF , made feel like a shitty and untalented writer. Consumed by my guilt for not writing anything and leaving you awaiting, my low self-esteem decreased and so I ended up with chapter.

There's still a part 3. so stay tuned.


	7. Chapter 7

You can find me in tumblr under "merganafanfics"

_**Obligatory disclaimer**_:Merlin and all associated creative properties belong to BBC. I don't claim any said property as my own, and I make no monetary profit from this fan-made story. All creative property not associated with said channel belong to me, and their use is limited to my express permission. Thank you.

_**Once AGAIN .THIS CHAPTER IS NOT EDITED. CONSIDER YOURSELF WARNED**_.

* * *

Chapter 7 : We have changed. **Part III**

* * *

Once in the dining room, Merlin sat across from Morgana at the table. Gaius along with Mordred and of course the king and queen joined them shortly they arrived there.

The dinner started with greeting from the late comers. Morgana ignored everyone including Mordred.

She was in no mood to be cheerful or to act happy.

The tension between Merlin and Morgana was obvious since neither of them bothered to hide it.

Glares were exchanges between these two and the whole room was drawn in awkward silence because of them. The rest sent some worried glanced in their direction. Yet none of them wanted to voice their bewilderment toward the odd behavior and eventually end it.

The silence was only broken when the prince's governess came into the room asking for the queen. Gwen left with the woman and the quiet once again returned.

"Is everything right?" Of course Arthur was the first one who decided to put an end to the uncomfortable situation.

"No"

"Yes"

Both Merlin and Morgana replied respectively at the same time, causing Arthur to arch an eyebrow.

Morgana gritted her teeth, glowering at Merlin who responded by rolling his eyes and huffing.

Arthur appeared to be hesitant to whether he should be amused or worried by their different answers.

He nodded his head, taking a sip from his drink.

"What's happened?" He once again asked, casually, his ton calm.

"Nothing" they replied together.

The other eyebrow followed up. "I see." Another sip. Arthur placed his goblet back on the table. He looked at Mordred then at Gaius.

"What's matter with them?" Gaius simply shook his head and shrugged. However, Mordred looked between his parents, and then his eyes were back on Arthur.

"Freya came for her monthly supplies; the three of them crossed paths."

"Oh!" His lips formed an 'o', then his eyes traveled between the warlock and his wife. He looked back at Mordred when those two didn't appear to be willing to elaborate on that matter.

"Is she alright? No harm was done to her?" The king inquired, his eyes concerned, but were fixed on Morgana, as if he trying to get a reaction from her. The latter was deadpanned; her face was cleared of any emotion.

Mordred quickly shook his head. "Do not worry. She left before…"He paused. "She ran the opposite direction when she saw Mother."

The knight and the king chuckled at that, Gaius smiled. Morgana shot Merlin a confused look which he instantly returned.

"That's good…excellent." Arthur breathed in relief. He gestured to the servant behind him and his goblet was instantly refilled.

"Why would you say that?" Merlin asked, his brow frowned, reflecting his perplexity.

Arthur shrugged "At least she's alive." The king sighed, his lips still curved in a smile.

The warlock's frown deepened. "Why wouldn't she be alive?"

_What could possibly happen that might do Freya any harm. What did Morgana have to do with that? _

The same questions were running through the witch's mind.

Arthur swallowed his drink before he responded, nonchalantly.

"Because last time she was here, Morgana almost killed Freya…"

Merlin gasped, he quickly glanced at the woman in question.

But Morgana snorted "I almost killed her today." She whispered under her breath and luckily no one heard her.

Arthur didn't notice their reaction and he continued to speak.

"….You remember, when Morgana accused you of being unfaithful to her with Freya."

Arthur gestured toward the highest priestess. "…and I so foolishly believed her."

"Believed her?" The warlock echoed, astonished. He tightened his hold on the spoon in his grasp. His knuckles turned white.

_Unfaithful? Him? With Freya?_

"But it wasn't true. Dear sister was feeling a bit protective of you. It's quite normal; they say women with child often get self-conscious. Even Gwen had her own moments. She thought I was cheating on her with her maidservant. At least she didn't try to kill her like Morgana. "

"You believed her?" Merlin repeated again, his voice louder, accusing.

"What?" Arthur widened his eyes. "Can you blame me…everybody knew about your reputation, but I know how faithful you are to Morgana, you could never do something like that to her."

"What reputation?" Merlin wondered.

"As the ladies man." Mordred chimed in. Four pairs of eyes were on him. His cheeks reddened at his sudden outburst. He looked down.

"WHAT?" The warlock shouted, his lips parted in astonishment.

Morgana burst out laughing. "Merlin! You must be joking."

Merlin gritted his teeth, his cheeks reddened in anger.

"That cannot be true…"he protested, standing up abruptly causing his chair to fall backward.

"Gwaine must have had quite the impression on Merlin…"Morgana teased, wiggling her eyebrows at Merlin. The later glared at her. He glanced at Arthur who said.

"No…that started way before Gwaine came to Camelot. He was actually rather jealous of Merlin."

"No…"Merlin shook his head frantically. "I am not that kind of man."

"I am married to a ladies' man." Morgana simply couldn't resist saying that again and the look of pure anger and disbelieve on Merlin's face made want to say it again and again just to pester and torment him.

"Alright, stop saying that…" Merlin warned, the rest looked at him with worry.

Morgana rolled her eyes. "What do you rather I call you then philanderer, miscreant or fornicator?" she smiled sweetly at him, resting her head on her hand.

His jaw dropped.

"That was a bit harsh, don't you think Morgana."

She shook her head, her eyes still on Merlin. "No. I don't believe so. It is the truth after all, is it not?"

"It is. I remember the night you escaped from your cell, all the knights were searching for and what Merlin was…with a woman and poor Gaius here tried to cover for him." Arthur said, grinning.

Merlin, quickly, gazed at the old physician. "That's not true, right?"

Arthur scowled. "No need to deny it Merlin, I've seen you with my own eyes…"

"Well, it's not." Gaius interrupted the king, answering Merlin's question.

Merlin almost jumped in happiness. Morgana pouted.

"Gaius!" Arthur exclaimed. "You don't have to defend him, I was there, and you were there."

The old man leaned forward. "You didn't exactly see the face of the woman did you?"

Arthur scowled, "No, but I know what I heard…"

"Well that was the lady Morgana."

The woman almost started coughing hysterically; she reached for her napkin, covering her mouth.

* * *

Merlin was walking the corridor after dinner when Mordred appeared next to him.

"I forgot to tell you, on my way back, I went to see grandparents. They say that they might come to Camelot before the birth of the child."

* * *

Laying on his back, Merlin stared at the ceiling above him, even though he could see absolutely nothing but darkness…

He couldn't sleep…not that he didn't want to, because he did, badly. His body ached, it was tired. Yet his mind refused to grant him the rest he wished for.

Anyone would be in the same state, Merlin thought, if they'd been up half of the night so far, trying not to think about what had transpired that day.

But too much had occurred during the day and he wasn't really sure what exactly had him that way.

It was either the fact that Freya and Mordred were alive or that he'd been raising the druid boy as his child. Or perhaps it was due to the talk he'd had with Morgana after she'd returned to Camelot and her wish to return to their dreaded reality. yet perhaps it was the news that his father was alive that had chased sleep away.

However, there was the possibility that all of those things combined together were the reason, he wasn't able to sleep.

Once he realized he couldn't stop thinking about that. He panicked, coming to the conclusion that his life at the moment wasn't that easy. That it wasn't the way he'd imagined being once he realized what had happened, where he was. The second chance he'd been offered.

There were too many issues and problems to solve. Too many secrets to disclose and he wasn't even near to accomplish any of that.

_How come his father was alive?_ That was the most important question and he had no idea how to answer it.

Subsequent to his little conversation with Mordred after dinner, he'd read…well reread some of the history books. He didn't know how he'd originally missed it but kilgharrah had never attacked Camelot.

So he and Arthur had no reason to go search for him. But if that was the case, then how did he find his father? Why did Mordred say that he'd gone to visit his grandparents, as in more than one? Did that mean that his father and mother were living together?

He then realized that this line of thinking was causing him to think about his father. Thinking about his father made him think about thinking about him. He was overanalyzing everything; he groaned and covered his face with his hands.

Sleep, that all he wanted at that moment….Perhaps he could go ask Gaius to make him one of those sleeping droughts...it seemed to be the only way for him to get what he needed.

But if he did that, there was a chance that he would have to wake the old physician. Yet Merlin was in desperate need to fall asleep.

He was contemplating that thought when his attention was disturbed abruptly as a sound of thrashing and whimpering reached his ears. The sound was coming from the direction of Morgana's bed.

Merlin had been laying on the floor since their sleeping arrangement had been established, his cot was behind the screen the same place he and Morgana had hidden Mordred while they'd treated his injuries.

He pushed the screen a bit, enough for him to get a look at her bed. He whispered a spell under his breath, adjusting his eyes to the dimness that enveloped the room.

He was right and it appeared that Morgana was having yet another one of her nightmares.

He sighed, considering whether he should go over to her and wake her up or he should just leave her alone.

Since the last time she'd had a nightmare and after he'd tried to comfort her, she had shoved him away, telling him to keep away from her, because after years of having them, she'd grew accustomed to her bad dreams. So, she definitely did not need him to soothe or calm her down, she certainly didn't want him to pity or commiserate with her.

With that in mind, he curled on his right side so he was facing the wall.

"Aithusa?" That came from Morgana. A cry out.

After that, they both sat up straight. Morgana jolted out of her reverie and Merlin was confused by what'd heard. Light filled the room; neither Merlin nor Morgana was sure who was responsible for it.

The warlock slowly stood up and made his way to her. She was yet to control her breathing. She was still panting.

Once he was closer to her bed, he stopped, his hands, behind his back.

"Are you alright?"

"I believe we have already agreed on this Merlin? Go back to sleep." She ordered a while after her breathing started to slow down, with a hand placed on her chest.

If he wasn't curious about why Morgana was calling out his dragon's name, or that he was a bit worried about her, the warlock wouldn't have bothered to drag his tired body there. He was trying to be nice; the least she could do was be appreciative.

But no, not Morgana.

He inhaled deeply and exhaling slowly, he was about to utter his question when Morgana sat on the edge of the bed, her feet already on the floor.

With a hand on her lower belly, the other on the mattress, Morgana tried to push herself up. Merlin could see how hard that was for her. He rushed to her side, his hand wrapped around her waist and the other reached out and grabbed hers.

"What are you doing?" Morgana yelled and glared at him. "Let go off me, Merlin." She yanked her arm out off his reach and slapped away the hand that was around her.

Merlin scowled. "Why did you do that?" His rubbed the place where she'd hit him.

Morgana huffed and shook her head. At last, she managed to stand up on her own, Merlin regarded her with hesitation.

"What were you trying to do, Merlin?" she adjusted her nightgown. She stood face to face with Merlin.

He let his eyes lock gaze with hers, "I just wanted to help you."

"I did not ask you to help me." She spoke with a hush yet cold tone.

"Yet you looked like you needed it." He countered, crossing his hands over his chest.

The two of them were staring at each other. His eyes on hers. Neither of them said a word, moved or even blinked.

Merlin was the first to look away from her piercing gaze.

"I just wanted to be nice." He explained, taking a step backward.

She snorted and replicated his move. "Nice? I doubt that of you, Merlin."

He arched an eyebrow. "Why?" He sounded genuinely hurt by her statement.

"Because you haven't been nice to me for the past four years."

She smirked, seeing that Merlin's expression fell. She turned around, resuming her way toward the door.

The warlock recovered fast and he followed her, standing between her and the door.

"Where are you going?" he asked. Morgana scoffed.

"I thought that since I'm awake and it is completely dark outside so most of the knights are most luckily have fallen asleep, why don't I make the best of that and just go and kill Arthur." She replied casually, the corner of her lips curved up.

His nostrils flaring, his eyes flashing and closing into slits. His hands closed into fists and he crouched forward, daring her to repeat once more what she'd just said. That only made her smile turn into a smirk.

"What?" Merlin hissed, doing his best not to shout at her.

Still she appeared unaffected by that which enraged him more.

"I have been trying to kill Arthur for how long?" She asked but she had no intention to let Merlin answer "Four…five years…do you really think it is clever of me to go and notify the only man that have been able to sabotage and interfere with my plans that I'm about to kill his precious king?" she said in one breath.

Merlin gulped. He studied her expression and then he breathed out in relief. It was hard to tell if she was being serious or just witty. But her statement cleared things for him.

"You're joshing." He let a smile grace his features, suppressing a laugh.

Morgana rolled her eyes, "Can you move now, Merlin?"

Realizing that he was still blocking Morgana's way, Merlin once again asked.

"Where are you going?"

"Do you really need to know?" Morgana always answered him with yet another question.

"Yes." Merlin said quickly, certain.

"Fine." Merlin's features relaxed a little as he waited for her speak.

"I thought that maybe you wanted the chamber for one of your midnight trysts." She moved closer to him, "you are man; after all…"their faces mere inches away. Merlin swallowed hard at their dangerous proximity. Morgana rested her hand on his chest.

Feeling the blood rush to his cheeks, Merlin tried to take her hand away but his hand was shaking and sweating.

"….you have needs to be fulfilled." Her eyes traveled downward, he knew where they were gazing at exactly. He tried to back away, but he was already pressed against the door.

"Anyway…" she took a step back. "…just stay away from my bed."

It was her eyes that gave her away, the glee in them that exposed her. He felt like he should be angry for what she just did, but surprisingly he wasn't.

"Ha Ha. Very funny, Morgana."

She shrugged. "Well I find it quite amusing. You should have seen the look on your face, Merlin. It was…"

He cut her off. "…I know it was funny."

"That's an understatement." she bit her bottom lip. "Can I go know?"

"You're still haven't told me where you are going?"

"It's the middle of the night, where do you think I'm going?"

"I don't know." He said.

"To the privy. "She finally gave him the correct answer and Merlin surprised her with what he said next.

"Why?"

She gapped at him. "For the same reason you go to there, Merlin."

Merlin Laughed sheepishly. "Oh! It's rather obvious, is it not?"

"I'm going to ask you for the last time, could you move so I can go?"

"You can go. I'm sorry." He moved out of her away.

Morgana opened the door a bit when Merlin grabbed her hand.

"What now, Merlin?" she growled, she opened the door further, however Merlin slammed it shut.

"Just stay here. I can prove I can still be nice to you." He said, grinning.

"Could it not wait? It's kind of an urgent matter." She crossed her hands over her chest, looking at him with annoyance written all over her face.

"No, it can't. Just wait I have it…"he looked down at his trousers.

"It's in my other trouser. Just wait here, don't go anywhere."

He ran back to his cot, locating his pants, his started to search its pockets, until he found what'd been looking for.

"Found it." He announced, emerging from behind the screen, the object in his hand.

But the room was empty, Morgana had already left it. He sighed, his shoulders slumped.

* * *

Morgana returned moments later, to find Merlin sitting on the edge of her bed.

He jumped to his feet the instant she entered the chamber.

"Why did you go? I told you to wait" he asked with a pout on his face. Morgana shut the door.

She licked her bottom lip, and then puffed in irritation. "Well I already informed you that it was urgent."

He took a deep breath. "I know." He held out his right hand, a piece of paper in it.

She didn't take it, she just eyed it carefully, that she just walked pass him.

"Is that your apology letter, Merlin? It's rather belated."

Merlin frowned. "I have nothing to apologize for."

The witch felt the air sucked out of her. As she gawped at him. She blinked couple of times, feeling the anger filling her.

Merlin seemed oblivious to the affect his utterance had on her. He continued to talk.

"It's a spell. It's for whenever you want to go the privy. To empty your bladder, so you don't have to get up …." She cut him off.

"It is late, and I'm quite tired." Her voice fluttered and Merlin's smile faded it away.

"Are you not going to take it? "Morgana snatched the paper from his hand and went to her bed.

She noticed that Merlin hadn't moved from his position. He was gawking at her.

"What?" she titled her head.

He shrugged. "'A thank you' would be nice." He told her, derisively. "This spell wasn't that easy to come across, I had to make sure it will do no harm to the child."

He was really getting on her nerves.

"A thank you? For this?" She waved the paper at him, exasperatingly.

"If this is your idea of being nice, then I'm afraid to tell you that it will not work." She almost tore that paper at threw the pieces at his face. Instead she took a deep breath in, trying to compose herself.

"Why is that?"

Morgana gave him a false smile. "I let you dwell on it. Perhaps you could discover the reason why."

She lay on her bed; Merlin made his way to his cot, but his stopped halfway and turned to her.

"I'm a dragon lord." He blurred out.

Form her position on the matters Morgana sat, her back pressed again the headboard.

"I know." She said, softly, feeling a little grateful for him to share that information.

"I…"he hesitated "…There are only two dragons left alive."

"Aithusa and kilgharrah." She whispered and Merlin didn't ask how she knew that.

He nodded his head. "I tried to summon them, but I couldn't."

Her heart skipped a bit, her eyes widening. "They are not dead, are they?" She asked urgently.

"No, they are not." He shook his head, reassuring her. "That's what I feared first."

Morgana breathed in relief. A smile formed.

"My father lives." Merlin added, his voice quivering. Morgana remain silent, letting him elaborate. He slowly walked to the side of her bed and sat next to her. Morgana didn't protest.

"After Morgause took you, I discovered that he was alive…but he died shortly after I found him…"he laughed bitterly "…he was killed the day after I found, actually. I never got a chance to know him." he confessed.

His eyes glistered with tears, if she was still mad at him for what'd said earlier, her anger melted away with pained look he was giving her at that moment.

"Why are you telling me this Merlin?" She asked gently.

He shrugged, his head down. "You know how it feels to lose a father."

"I did not mourn Uther's death" she told him sternly.

"I'm aware of that. I wasn't referring to Uther. I mean Goloris." He sniffed, wiping his tears.

There was a moment of heavy silence that followed.

"I'm glad you're telling me this Merlin, but"…she paused. "Gwen lost her father; Arthur suffered after Uther's death. Why did you not speak with them about your feelings of losing your father?"

He let out a forlorn sigh, and rubbed the back of his neck. He didn't say anything.

Morgana narrowed her eyes, his silence made her realize something.

"They don't know, you never told them."She reasoned, her voice laced with disbelieve.

"I couldn't. You and Gaius are the only one I told." He looked up to see Morgana watching him with sadness in her eyes.

"Then go to him…you have a chance to know him this time." She encouraged him. "It's an opportunity you may never get again. Trust me."She added. She placed her hand on top of his and gave it a little squeeze.

"You're still planning on going back are you?" He couldn't hide his disappointment when she nodded affirmatively.

"I just don't think I can spend another day in this castle."

"You were trying to rule Camelot Morgana; you were going have to live here." He argued.

"Everything happened so suddenly…All I need is some time to think…clearly."

"Then come with me…"he suggested, his eyes brightening up.

"Why, Merlin?" she attempted to pull her hand away but Merlin grabbed it fast.

"For many reasons…"

"Name them."

"Well…um, first, it'll be a change of scenery for you, so you could think clearly like you want. Second…"he grinned mischievously. "…It'll delay your search for the spell so our stay here extend."

She snorted "I could always take the books with me." He rolled his eyes.

"Finally…you can be my mortal support. Because frankly I don't think I could do it alone." He swallowed the lump in his throat.

She pressed her lips together; she inhaled and rubbed her temple.

"I'll think about it."

"Thank you." A tear slipped down his face, he didn't bother to wipe it.

"I didn't agree yet, Merlin." But he squeezed her hand. And repeated "thank you...For listening"

She pulled her hand away, as if his skin burned her. When he glanced up, he was surprised to see tears in her red eyes, she as trying to suppress her tears.

"Go back to sleep before I do something to harm you." She whispered her voice shaky. She didn't give him a chance to ask why she was crying.

"Why would you want to harm me?" He furrowed his brow, titling his head.

"You just told me that you have been granted a chance to reunite with your father and that makes you happy…." She paused. "I don't want you to be happy." She wiped away her tears, sniffing.

* * *

The darkness was back and once again Merlin found himself laying waiting for sleep to come. The last words Morgana had told him were harsh and it pained him to hear them.

But the small talk they shared prior to that confession was kind and it made him remember the old Morgana the one before he poisoned her. So perhaps deep down she was still there. Maybe there was still a chance for him to set her free.

That thought made him smile, even though he didn't get much sleep that day, thinking about _that_ Morgana warmed his heart.

* * *

**A/N:** _I hope you liked it. if you came across any mistakes please be kind and point them out for me to fix. i was kind of in a hurry to publish this chapter. _

_Thanks to all the readers that reviewed the previous chapters. Keep the reviews coming if you liked this one as well._


	8. Chapter 8

_**Obligatory disclaimer**_:Merlin and all associated creative properties belong to BBC. I don't claim any said property as my own, and I make no monetary profit from this fan-made story. All creative property not associated with said channel belong to me, and their use is limited to my express permission. Thank you.

_**Once AGAIN .THIS CHAPTER IS NOT EDITED. CONSIDER YOURSELF WARNED. if stumbled upon any mistakes, please point them out for me. **_

_Last time, there was a long hiatus, you guys received a chapter with more than 8k words, this time it has only 5k. Sorry. _

* * *

**Chapter 8 : THE TRIP**

* * *

The child kicked her in her left side. At first, she thought the carriage had merely hit a large rut and jarred her body. Morgana snuggled back into the corner and tried to return to her slumber. Before she could settle in again, he kicked again and Morgana groaned at the discomfort.

Her eyes fluttered open and she, tiredly, raised her right hand, rubbing them. She glanced down, noticing the opened book on her lap. She must have fallen asleep while reading it. Sniffing, Morgana closed and put it aside, placing it on the bench, beside her.  
She moved the blanket aside and looked down at her swollen stomach, staring down at it; she still couldn't believe that she was truly with child. She closed her eyes briefly, knowing fully that she would not be able to fall asleep any time soon. Once the child inside began kicking and moving, all types of sleep and comfort would abandon her, leaving her with nothing but restlessness and back pain. Something that she was still trying hard to adjust to.

Her son-Morgana wasn't completely certain if she should believe the tale Gwen had informed her of, about the seer and her vision- pressed one of his limbs against her insides, she winced. Her hands smoothed across the baby.

Morgana was conflicted as what she preferably referred to the small human-being inside her. Should she call it; the child or just _her_ child? She liked the former. It made her feel less attached to it.

But if she were to be honest with herself, discomfort and uneasiness were not the only feelings that would stir within her, every time the baby moved. She shook her head. But she wasn't going to admit the truth and she definitely wasn't going to let herself indulge in such absurd matter as the feeling of utter admiration for the fact she was carrying a child. Merely because it was _his_.

She rubbed lazy circles against her abdomen, wishing that the child would cease his movements, if she were lucky enough, she might return to her sleep.

Her hands stopped their slow motion, placing them at her sides. She sighed. Suddenly she was overcome with yet another feeling; she grunted and pulled the blanked away from her. It fell down by her feet.  
The shades covering the window made it dark inside the buggy, perfect for napping; she pulled them back so she could look outside for Merlin. She needed to get the drivers attention.  
The sight line out the small pane of glass was limited and she couldn't find him. He must be scouting ahead or talking to the driver. Morgana struggled to stand up in the moving vehicle. Her belly made it difficult and the rocking motion from the carriage springs made covering the small distance to the other seat seem impossible. She braced herself on the roof with her hand as she pushed the back of the seat with the other easing her way up. She couldn't fully stand in the buggy so she hunched over. She was able to get to her feet just as the horse trotted them over another large rut in the road.  
Luckily as she was falling she was able to twist herself so she landed on the soft bench, exactly where she was trying to be. She struggled to a sitting position and then knocked on the roof by the man handling the reins.  
"Where is Merlin?" She managed to shout at him over the noise of the road and squeaks of the buggy. She was feeling tired already from only that small effort to change seats.  
Her thoughts were jostled as she felt the carriage easing to a halt. The door was flung open and Merlin's face appeared. He looked annoyed.  
"We still haven't arrived yet Morgana" He somehow thought that he had anticipated her question and Morgana pressed her lips into a thin line. Merlin just stood there waiting for her to say anything.

"Bring me apples." She told him, it was more like an order; the way she talked made him like he was just another servant from Camelot all over again. He didn't like that one bit.

Since the beginning of their dreadful journey, Morgana had been acting a bit different from her usual self, she became rather ornerier.

He stared at her. "You want an apple?" He quirked an eyebrow at her. _She stopped the carriage for that?_

"Apples" she told him, emphasizing the's' "I'm hungry." Coolly, she added, her calm tune irritating him more.

"And you assume that an apple is able to ease your hunger?" He leaned against the small door.

She shook her head. "Well it might not, but it will certainly ease my craving for said fruits."

_Craving_? Since when did Morgana crave anything but power and the throne of Camelot?

Considering that apples were easy things to provide to his 'expectant wife', Merlin was thankful for that and was more than happy to comply.

"Are you simply going to stand there or shall I fetch them myself?" with that he regained his attention, he looked over at her, Morgana was glaring at him.

Merlin grumbled and disappeared for few moments and when he reappeared, he held out his hand to her. A small bowl, filled with her lasted craving, and Morgana accepted it with a big smile.

"Do you want us to stop again?" He ignored her lack of gratitude, he straightened his shoulders.

She sighed "No need to be grumpy, Merlin. We have been traveling for two days now; we should have arrived there by now."

Merlin's lips curved into a fake smile as he gazed directly at her. "That would have been true if we didn't have to stop every now and then because of you, besides we are traveling at slow pace." He shot back. Morgana was well aware of that; it had been after all Gaius' order and primary concern when they had told the court physician about their upcoming trip.

Morgana narrowed her eyes at him. "Are you really putting the blame on me?" she spoke with a low and intent tone. "…because if I recall correctly, you were the one who begged me to accompany you."

"Begged you?" Almost offended, Merlin uncrossed his arms. "That is not true. I did not beg you." He insisted with a stern voice, recoiling.

She snorted, and he responded by gritting his teeth. Merlin still remembered everything that had transpired that night and the day after, no pleading or begging had taken place. Although, he did ask for her company but that was it, nothing more.

"Believe me Merlin you did, you pleaded with me until I agreed." He expected her to flash him one of her smirks, a way he assumed that Morgana thought, was effective to annoy him. But much to his surprise, she didn't.

Not wanting to get in yet another argument with her, Merlin let her remark slide without a comment from him.

He sighed. "Is that all? You don't require anything else?" He sounded tired. Perhaps, anticipation and what awaited them once they arrived were having their toll on him.

She chose not to voice her assumption and instead she remained silent. Morgana simply reached out and raised her hand to her mouth, taking a bite from an apple. He watched her closed her eyes as her teeth sank into the fruit. A sound resembled a moan escaped her lips, and made Merlin's eyes widen slightly .He then climbed into the buggy. The quaking that was caused made her snap out of her delight state and she fixed her eyes on at him. Morgana's forehead wrinkled.

She mumbled something that Merlin wasn't able to understand due the food that her mouth was stuffed with as she spoke.

He stopped his movement, he was still hunched over. "What did you say?" He inquired with a smile.

He gave her a look that said_ -Where are your manners now lady Morgana?_ But he thought better than to do so. However, he knew for sure that she asked herself the same question just after she had realized her omission.

She began to chew quickly. Once she finally swallowed, Morgana asked, heat rose to her cheeks, either she was embarrassed for her ill-behavior or she was annoyed by his smug smirk. "I said what you were doing?"

He heaved a sigh at her ludicrous question .He sat on the bench across from her. "I'm exhausted. I need to sleep."

His legs stretched on the bench and he leaned his head near the small window, on the side.

Before he closed his eyes, Merlin hit the interior of buggy, the sound of his hand colliding with wood made Morgana cringe.

Apparently Merlin's action was a signal to the driver outside and as a result their trip was resumed.

At last, the warlock was able to relax; he folded his arms in his lap.

"Hand me that book will you, Merlin?" the latter opened an eye, looking toward her and she gestured to a book placed next to him. He followed her direction and saw the book was under his feet.

"Sorry." He murmured under his breath as he handed it to her.

Heavy and unbearable silence filled the small space between Merlin and Morgana, moments later. Nevertheless, they both welcomed and appreciated it. The only sound cutting through it was the sign of Morgana's consumption of apples.

"Most of the times, you make me regret ever telling you about my father, Morgana." Merlin blurred out suddenly. His voice was soft as he spoke.

So far, Morgana had managed to twist ever single word he had told her and used it to her own vantage. He hopped he'd no longer make the same mistake. And the best way to do that was to refrain from sharing anything with her.

She peered up from her book. Surprised by his unexpected utterance, Morgana's lips parted. She stared at him for a while before her eyes settled on the book on her lap once again. She turned the page, and then she shrugged nonchalantly. "I would have find out about him either way"

He exhaled a forlorn sigh. He shifted in his spot, attempting to find a more comfortable position. He leaned back closing his eyes.

* * *

He couldn't sleep. The truth was that he wasn't tired so rest wasn't something that he was seeking. He'd simply grow bored on his own. The driver that accompanied them wasn't a very talkative man. And after two days raveling with the lad, Merlin preferred sharing the remaining of their trip with Morgana over silence. He missed Arthur's company already.

Trying to distract himself with something, Merlin almost asked Morgana how was her research for a way back progressing so far. But dreading the reply he might receive from her, his mouth opened and closed couple of times before he snapped it shut and decided to actually attempt to get some sleep.

Needless to say, he failed at that once again. So he settled his eyes on her, watching as she ignored his presence and continued to eat her apples and read her book simultaneously.

It surprised him how quickly she managed to blend in with their new life. She looked different; there was no use in denying the obvious.

Her hair was no longer messy and disheveled. Her choice in cloths no longer contained the color black. It confused him, the reason that she changed her appearances ever since they had gotten there, was it to simply keep up her cover?

Leaning backward, Merlin allowed his gaze to sweep over her, scanning every bit of her. She had changed, at least on the outside.

Her hair, her cloths, they had all looked different. Her eyes on the other hand, they were a delicate and confusing dilemma.

They puzzled him. At times, they were vacant, shallow- a clear and evident proof of the hatred and resentment she hide inside- but from time to time, for just a brief period, those eyes would shine , brighten up with something other than those feelings. Like when he opened up about his father.

She'd settle her gaze at him; her emerald eyes would be kind, caring, yet not happy. They would never happy. Sad, sometimes….well most of the times, he bitterly corrected himself.

He averted his eyes once more over her form and this time they landed on her stomach.

If he were to be completely honest with himself, her swollen belly was the most noticeable and important change in Morgana. Forget the hair, the cloths and her unexplainable moods.

It was still an astonishing and hard to fully grasp the concept that 'The Lady' Morgana was in fact carrying his child. The truth, he'd been shoving that thought on regular basis to the back of his mind.

He just wanted to pass time and so he found himself interrupting her reading with a question.

"How do you suppose this happened?"

Irritated, Morgana looked up. "What is it now Merlin?" he repeated his question and Morgana followed his gaze that was settled on her stomach.

She quirked her eyebrows up. Her hand halfway to her mouth, it stopped midair. "How?"

Her voice reflecting her amazement at his question.

"We shagged…" she paused .Weighting the words she had uttered, Morgana shuddered. "Well not us, the other us." She corrected with half shrug and continued to eat her apple.

Felling the color rise to his cheeks, Merlin's eyes fell in embarrassment. "That's…that's not what I…I meant…" he stuttered. "Although, I…I do know how that …happened. Trust me I do"

Luckily for him, Morgana decided to relieve him out of his misery. "You are curious as to how we ended up married and expecting?"

"Yes" he all but screamed as he nodded frenetically. "That is what I wanted to ask."

"I don't know." She replied "To be honest, I do not care"

He was puzzled, Merlin bit his lower lip. "Are you not intrigued?"

"Intrigued?" she stared at him with blank expression. It lasted for a while and Merlin was about to call her name when she shook her head as she tried to focus her attention back to Merlin. "Even if I am, it will serve no good. It will not changed what really happened and it will certainly not alter the truth." Her expression darkened her voice cold. "I am dead."

His expression much hers, when he realized that she blaming him for what had happened. "You chose your path." He tried to defend himself.

"Still, you cannot deny your contribution in helping me make that choice."

* * *

The silence was back and this time it was an awkward and a thick one. At least, that how it felt to Merlin who found himself wondering how things ended up differently there for him and Morgana.

The idea that a servant like him had managed to win over the heart of a woman like the lady Morgana was both unbelievable and astonishing. Although, they both remained ignorant as to how such thing had been established between them. The history wasn't interested in the matter of the heart or the sentiments so such information couldn't be found in the history books they had brought from the library of Camelot. The other predicament was that they couldn't just simply ask about matters that Merlin and Morgana should have witnessed and lived first-hand.

What they knew was very little yet it explained so much. He discovered that he'd helped Morgana escape her capture and he'd hid her somewhere near Camelot. Uther's health had worsened rather quickly and earlier than what had originally happened during his time line. And Morgause's arrival at Camelot and her attempt to damage the relation between Arthur and his father had served only to accelerate Uther's death.

Even though, Arthur had tried to take his father's life, shortly after but he had discovered the truth… the one that Merlin had tried to hide from him and it had only led to heighten the hate that his master had held against magic and the ones that practiced it .But the Merlin from this reality had been honest about what really had happened and had managed to stop the prince from killing Uther…

"I thought you need it to sleep." Her voice snapped him back to reality. The first thing he noticed as his eyes came into focus was that his gaze was fixed on her chest. Slowly, he raised his head to her face.

"I was just thinking." he smiled weakly.

Morgana arched her eyebrows at him and then she nodded her head and resumed her reading.

That was weird.

A while later, Morgana shifted in her seat, her free hand, the one that wasn't holding the book, was on her abdomen, he regarded as Morgana, absently rubbed it..._affectionately?_

He frowned.

Abruptly, her eyes diverted up, locking gaze with his. His jerked, but didn't look away. He gulped at the piercing glare she was giving him.

It was only Merlin's semi-incredulous gaze that made her realize her hand had warped around her belly again, rubbing gently back and forth as though she was subconsciously trying to sooth the baby developing beneath her skin.

Morgana flushed, dropping her hand and wondering why's done that in front of him.

She gulped and her eyes tuned gold as she uttered words of magic. Merlin recognized the spell that Morgana had cast and he smirked.

"You're using the spell I gave you."

"Would you rather if I halt the carriage?" she argued.

He shook his head.

"Then shut up, Merlin. I am trying to read"

* * *

They were staring at each other now. For no obvious reason. Maybe they thought it was a good way to waste time, as boredom invaded the small place between them.

But it was definitely a terrible idea.

"I have this feeling that this trip will not end well." Morgana stated suddenly, Merlin glanced up at her with frowned brow. Morgana's eyes remained fixed on the book.

"What do you mean by that?" He shifted in his seat.

"When it came to your family, Merlin, I am clueless as to how to act when I'm with them." Her statement was honest, and slowly he began to understand her meaning.

His frowned deepened; Merlin licked his bottom lip before he said.

"Well…" He paused, breathing in. "…that make the two of us, Morgana." He said. "My mother is the only family I have ever known…" his lips threatened into a frown. "…and Gaius is …."

The truth was, Merlin never knew what a father figure could be like. So when it came to labeling the type of relation he shared with Gaius, Merlin found it hard to achieve that.

At his uncompleted sentence, Morgana looked up, her face expressionless.

"What about him?" she asked.

Laughing bitterly, Merlin shook his head.

"You are right, Morgana, I think this trip will surely end with a complete and utter letdown."

She closed her book, warping both her hands around it; Morgana hugged it closer to her chest.

"You have no idea who he is, don't you?" The tone of her voice was laced with sympathy kindness, something that made a smile tug at Merlin's lips.

He shook his head, muttering a 'no'. "But I know that he loved my mother dearly." A small smile graced his features, that fact was enough for him to make his heart flatter with joy.

Morgana scoffed. Merlin narrowed his eyes at her, harshly.

"What?"

"Nothing." She shrugged.

"No, you want to say something, simply say it Morgana."

"I don't know anything about your father, Merlin. So, I'm in no position to provide you with my opinion if I'm ignorant to the events that led to your father's abandonment of both you and your mother."

"He was forced to do that, Uther had sent knights after him."

A small laugh escaped her lips and Merlin clenched his jaw, her amusement was infuriating him.

"Pray tell Merlin, how did Uther manage to ruin your family as well?"

"He didn't…"he paused, thinking. "I'm not saying anything to you, Morgana." Remembering the vow that he'd promised himself about not telling her anything, Merlin reluctantly chose not to set her straight.

Morgana shrugged her shoulders; she didn't appear to want to ask any more questions. He was grateful for that.

Merlin was gazing outside. The abrupt sound of a book closing startled him and Merlin looked at her.

"Come on, Merlin! Tell me ." she snapped at him.

"Tell you what?" He feigned ignorance.

"What did Uther do to your family?" she asked. "…to force your father to leave you and your mother."

He gnawed on his lip. "I thought you are busy reading your book."

"This?" Morgana shifted in her seat, holding the said book high. "I have already finished it a while back. I just didn't want to stop the carriage again to get another one."

"So you have been pretending all this time…" he wondered, frowning.

"Yes. Pretending." Morgana admitted.

"I should have known how good you are at doing that."

"Not as good as you are Merlin." She said, bleakly.

Sheepishly, Merlin grinned. "Thank you."

"It was not a compliment, Merlin"

"I know."

Morgana narrowed her eyes and then nudged the tip of her noise. "I have the feeling that you are avoiding the matter."

"I will tale you…" he tilted his head the right side. "Only if you promise that you will not say anything until I'm finished."

"You have my word." She said quickly, with a small frown.

"Alright." Merlin took a deep breath. "Have you heard about the attack on Camelot by a dragon?"

She squinted then nodded her head. "I did. I heard it was brutal and gruesome. Morgause was hoping that we might the news of Uther or Arthur's death during it…"

"Sorry to disappoint." He cut her off.

"Finish your tale Merlin"

And he did as she asked.

* * *

The first thing that left Morgana's mouth after he finished speaking was a gasp.

Surprised by that Merlin cleared his dry throat. He thought that she must have been touched and was feeling apologetic.

"We have another thing in common, Merlin" she recovered from her shocked stated and her lips curved upward into a smile.

"What is that?" confusion washed over his features.

"We are both bastard children"

* * *

Merlin huffed, shaking his head. He pursed his lips together, trying not to snap at her.

He pushed the shades that covered the window, peering outside. Morgana, across from him, watched him in mild satisfaction. When he furrowed his brow, confusion washing over his features, she leaned forward.

"What's the matter?"

He didn't glance toward her, his eyes widening and Morgana, realizing that something must have been wrong for Merlin to act like that, scooped closer to her side of the window, mimicking Merlin's movements, her eyes were fixed on the road.

"This is not the path to Ealdore." He stated without glancing at her. His grip on the shades tightened.

Her eyes widened. "You think the driver made a mistake?"

He shook his head and glanced at her, his expression was still hard to read. "I asked for someone who knew his way to my parents' house…" he sighed.

"Then they must have changed their residence." She moved away from the window, she reached to grab her book when Merlin said.

"That's unlikely. Why would they do that?"

"If you are worried, ask the driver."

He shook his head and ran a hand through his hair. "That would certainly raise suspicion."

"We could always kill him." she stated bluntly.

"We?" he asked. "What do you mean 'we'? I'm not going to kill anyone Morgana."

She rolled her eyes. "You don't seem to have that problem when it comes to me" she murmured testily.

A dull ache throbbed briefly through his chest, and Merlin wondered when the mention of what he'd done to her would ever not hurt.

He maintained a straight face and pretended to ignored her "No one is going to kill or be killed, is that understood? I'm sure this-"

She interjected sullenly. "Someone always die, Merlin. No matter how hard you try to prevent that."

"-thing would be clarified shortly…." He trailed off, registering what Morgana had said.

"I thought we agreed that you will not kill anyone or else I'll be striping you out of your magic."

"I do remember our agreement, Merlin. However, I said nothing about not _trying_ to kill anyone." Her voice was loaded with sarcasm; she offered a big grin to prove how nonchalant and indifferent she was about his threat.

"Morgana" He warned with a firm and harsh tone.

"Merlin" Morgana imitated him. Yet, her expression was hard as if she wasn't doing that simply to anger Merlin but in reality because she meant it.

"If you hurt anyone, I will take your magic." He leaned forward. And she did the same.

"Do that, Merlin and I promise you…"

"What?" He promoted. "What will you do?"

"Your parents shall be the first ones I kill."

He raised his eyebrow, his eyes brightening up with delight. "How are going to achieve that when you no longer have your magic?"

She smirked. "Perhaps, you have forgotten, but I'm quite skilled with a sword."

A throaty laugh escaped his lips making Morgana's face fell.

"What's so amusing?"

"You have a disadvantage." He told her. Merlin, from across of her, took away the book and bowl that were placed by her side and put them on his bench.

"What disadvantage?" She asked, confusion washing over her features. As she realized what he done, she frowned. What are-?"

Swiftly, and unlike her, Merlin was able to move from one bench to the other without much of an effort. He sat next to her.

She waited for him to reply to her question but then she felt slight pressure on her abdomen, she glanced down. She noticed that his hand was on her stomach, resting there lazily. But she understood the meaning behind his gesture, the weakness he mentioned. She was with a child, she was heavy, uncoordinated. Without her magic, she was vulnerable. She was weak. Her hands began to shake.

Refusing to appear exposed and affected by his threat, Morgana cleared her throat, forcing a smile to grace her features. One hand clenched the mattress of the bench, her nails sinking in as she tried to stop its trembling to the point her knuckles turned white. The other hand, Morgana put it on top of his. She looked up. Her eyes met his.

"Don't tempt me Merlin; I will be forced to prove you wrong." She tried her best to make her voice be as steady as possible, yet Merlin saw right through her weak attempt. It was fear that gave her away. Fear that shone brightly in her eyes. Her smile was stale, which was rather obvious.

"Please do." He challenged boldly, his smile widening.

Her whole body tensed. Her eyes widening with shock at his smug reply. Quickly, his smile became a smirk and her fake grin disappeared into a grimace.

She averted her eyes away, glancing at their joined hands; she swallowed the lump that formed in her throat.

Merlin sat there silently enjoying that moment. At last he finally managed to rend her speechless, he outwitted her.

Merlin was proud of himself. That was a rare moment and he was not certain when another similar moment might present itself once again, but for now, he decided he was going to fully take pleasure in her despair.

After everything she had done over the years, it was the least thing he could do. But that didn't mean he wasn't scared that she might attempt something. He knew Morgana when she was feeling intimidate by someone she'd simply attack them.

And in his case, he did not want Morgana to throw him out off the carriage while it was still moving. Slowly he scooped away from her, and contemplated returning back to his bench.

He never got a chance to carry on with his decision, as Morgana's hand left his. Shortly after that, he heard a sniff.

Merlin furrowed his brow.

"Morgana, are you alright?" He received a hum from her.

He moved his hand from her abdomen and rested it on her shoulder gently. "What's the matter? Tell me." He urged her worriedly.

"I am fine." She snapped and shoved his hand away. As she did that, she had raised her head and now Merlin could see her face.

"Are you crying?" he asked, shocked.

She shook her head while she tried to wipe the tears away. "No, I'm not."

Merlin scoffed, the evidence was clear and right in front of his eyes. "If you think I will be fooled by that, Morgana then you are mistaken."

Her lips parted and she blinked twice.

He changed seats and was now sitting across from her. just like she had said earlier she was good at pretending.

His apology, the one that'd hopped she'd accept after Morgana had been found was honest and she, just like that moment, had tears falling down her face and he had thought that she had forgiven him.

"You are pathetic." He hissed through gritted teeth.

He closed his eyes as her sobs slowly began to subside and eventually the calm was back. He was finally able to doze off with a big grin on his face.

* * *

A/N : my sincere apology for the lack of updates.

Thank you for reading this_ **ThE UnKnOwN gOd-fictionOVERreality101-zarifa2013-Renaissancebo oklover108-4 mergana -chronos the cookie thief-Dessert Maniac-AnnTheAnonymous-desire-Bookworm94 -REDBLUE12-sarah.**_

_**If you enjoyed reading this chapter, please review , the lack of feedback is really putting my muse down.**_


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